I sit upon my grave and ponder why
You smiled so deep, hidden, inside when you told the lie
Of how we "must" be apart, you and I

Visions of what could have been dancing in my mind
Taking an icicle-blue rose laid off of my tombstone
Watching how the colors of the radiant setting sun
Play upon its crystalline, delicate petals as I twirl it gently
The thorns embrace my snow white hand as it spins
Crimson flowers bloom upon my skin
As I think of you again

In my hands I hold your words so frail and beautiful
You didn't want to have to do this
It was only to end your pain
It was only to begin my pain
Although I must confess, sitting here holding your words,
That I brought most of this upon myself

As I slowly tear the petals away,
Laying upon this grave today,
I begin to see again
How easy it is to run from our sin
How easy it is to say we care
When really our feelings are neither here nor there

Musing silently to myself as my breath fogs the air
I know that once upon a time you really did care
But now my vision of your face has passed away
That part of me lies below where I lay
Reclining upon the earth of my old self
I hear your words again
You wished this didn't have to happen
And yet...
You changed nothing
You let the wish become a wish

All the petals are gone now
The rose's bare, cold heart in my cold hand
Deep, lovely soft petals scattered across the land
I see...

I stand up to go
Turn around and let my old self know
This is the end
As the sun sets in a last radiant glow of beauty
The night rolls in
Enveloping my memories of Us.

Now it's just me.

05/03/2004