::The Writer's Lament::

by Kurome Shiretsu

Oh, harken, my brethren, to my mournful lament

Of my dismal existence and my time that is spent

In writing of dragons, of ghouls and of elves,

And of planets far off with beings not like ourselves,

Of characters brave, resourceful and cunning,

Of demons and monsters who send mere mortals running.

Yes, creating such tales is how my life has been spent.

Now hear as I tell of the Writer's Lament.

Every eve when I come home, exhausted from school

I settle myself on my computer-desk's stool,

And there will I sit until day becomes night,

Struggling to overcome the Writer's Block Blight,

A terrible illness from which all authors suffer

And against which no one has discovered a buffer.

I sit and I think, and I think and I sit,

And because of the Blight, all I write sounds like . . . garbage.

It's there! I can feel it, in the back of my head:

A story just waiting to be typed, to be read,

A poem awaiting the time of its birth,

A character of such immeasurable worth,

And they just won't come out! They're all trapped in my mind,

Far out of my reach, in a place I can't find.

Irritation abounds as I search for a way

To put into words just what I want to say.

And look! Here it comes, a sentence at last!

The opening line! Four hours . . . that was fast!

Now I'm on a roll and words come in a torrent

(. . . the tale of a dragon fighting beings most abhorrent . . . ).

Lo and behold! The first chapter is done.

(Is this what it feels like to have your first son?)

Pride floods my breast. How could I possibly frown?

I'm ready to post it . . . and that darn site is down.

Two days have passed. The site's up. Time to post.

I just know all the reader's will like my story the most!

I've checked it once, checked it twice. I can find no mistake.

I sort through the system that all new postings take,

(First a password and guidelines, then a subject and rating),

But my story is up and I'm through with the waiting.

I go for a visit to make sure all is well.

And despair when I see my formatting shot to . . . heck.

If ever there was punishment for unforgivable sin,

I've found it. Writing html is a fight you can't win

All those brackets and slashes and letters insane

(I have b's, p's, hr's, i's and u's on the brain)

Should my text look like this? Or would this one be best?

I want this over and done with so I can go rest!

I give up, I have paragraphs and periods. Let's be brief.

I'll go ahead and post; I've had enough grief!

My first review ever! Angels sing, Earth rejoice!

A reader has read what I wrote, heard my voice!

I click on the icon, my breath caught in my chest,

(the hour it takes loading, I catch up on my rest).

Now the moment of truth. I lean forward, intent.

Did I have any errors? Was my time writing well spent?

Did they hate it or love it? Were they stunned? Were they floored?

. . . "this iz such a gr8 stry, plz, quik, writte som mor"