Why can't I cry?

I deserve to
I tried
And failed
And lost
And maybe can't
Recover
I did my best
It wasn't enough

Why can't I cry?
I want those tears
I need them
To show I'm human
I'm crying inside
But it's not enough
For me

Why can't I cry?
I should be sad
I should be relieved
But I'm neither
I claim to have emotion
But can't show tears
When needed

Why can't I cry?
I deserve to cry
I deserve
I tried
And failed
And lost
A part of me absorbed
Into the black depths
Of my soul

Why can't I cry?
To shed human tears
Like a knife in my heart
Boom
Bang
Crash
Aftermath

Why can't I cry?
I failed even
Though not
Really
I need
That good cry
Everyone has one once
In a while
Why me?

Why can't I cry?
Am I really happy?
No, I'm not.
I don't know
How to feel
Except I want to cry

Why can't I cry?
I want to
I really want to
I deserve a cry
It's over and done
I need to cry
I am inside, but
Not outside

Why can't I cry?
Do I know how?
I want to
I deserve to
I need to
I may be crying
On the inside, but

Why
Can't
I
Cry?