Author's Comments

What started as friendship developed into love, and after high school Tobias and Sebastian saw a bright future ahead of them. Together with Elizabeth, the Triad was invincible and inseparable, but are they really? College came and went, but no one can predict the future and the trials and temptations that Fate throws their way, and when things go horribly wrong can they forgive and forget, or is the fairytale over for good? (m/m, some adult language and situations)

Like it's predecessor, Lazuli Synecdoche is written in first person and switches between the point of view of the two main male characters, Tobias and Sebastian. However, although it is a sequel,you need not read Rhododendron Woes to understand and (hopefully) enjoy LS, but by no means will I discourage anyone from doing so if they want.

Updates are random until I finish it XD



7/08/04 – Just as Sebastian thinks he's put the past behind him, the wounds reopen, as fresh and painful as if days rather than years have gone by. Who he was then is not who he is now, but is that change enough to get through a reunion he never wanted?

7/13/04 – I couldn't wait and uploaded the next chapter. In Chapter Two, with Elizabeth as referee, Tobias and Sebastian reunite, but naturally Liz has something up her sleeve for the both of them.

To everyone who reviewed, in particular those who were so vehement -- Spirit / Engelique, Stefen, joyandsorrow, skateaddiction, Dream Fox, Cybeleflame, and Genuine -- thank you so much for your comments! I was very, very curious how those who read and enjoyed Rhododendron Woes would feel about Lazuli Synecdoche's surprising start, and reading your reviews made me smile, because I realized I'd succeeded in creating characters people could like and care about. Yay! As for what happened and who hurt whom, that is part of the mystery to be revealed, but remember that each person will see it differently. So while some fact will remain constant, certain things will vary depending upon who the narrator is.

7/17/04 – Chapter Three is up. Tobias and Sebastian get a moment alone, and without Liz to keep tempers in check, the fur flies. They still have one thing in common, but is it enough?

Stefen, you may be "a nutter" but I adorn your ranting reviews. The same goes out to the rest of you nutters. As for what Liz is thinking, rest assured that Tobias and Seba are wondering the same thing.
- There was one typo, I'm guessing. At the start of the chapter, it says that Sebastian put his glasses on, and THEN began "blindly groping" for them. So you may want to change that – xStarxCounterx (Chapter 2)
Thank you! I must have messed up when editing, but it's fixed now.

7/21/04 – Chapter Four brings sheds some light upon the roots of the conflict, but it's only half of the story. Truth, however, is like beauty; it's all in the eye of the beholder.

I'd done some research beforehand, but since my grasp of French cursing isn't too great I did some more. (Warning, some naughty words follow )
Putain from pute f 1. whore, tart, hooker; 2. vulg. woman (derogatory); 3. interj. bloody hell! fucking hell!: i.e. cette putain de machine this fucking machine.
Pute from L putidus rotten, stinking f 1. whore, bitch, cowtart, hooker; 2. vulg. woman (derogatory).
So everyone was right. Putain or pute are acceptable, although which is more often used I don't know, like using harlot versus slut
- …shouldn't it be 'aisle' instead of 'isle'? – Stefen (Chapter 4)
Yes indeed it should be! An isle is "an island, esp. a small one". And now we know why everyone needs another set of eyes to look over their work. Fixed.

7/23/04 – Chapter Five has been uploaded, and we finally get the other side of the story, or at least part of it.

7/28/04 – Liz has always been the one constant in both their lives, and it's she who saw Sebastian through the latest trials in his life. For a long time, however, she remained silent, but why? Nothing is forever, though, and in Chapter Six, it's finally time to break her silence. But is Tobias ready to hear it?

- Why did Seba not try to explain to Tobe? For that matter, why didn't Liz? – Stefen (Chapter 5)
I love it when people ask the very questions I asked myself. Hopefully 6 will give you some answers. I also adore how the anger, in general, has shifted from Seba, whom everyone thought was cheating, to Tobe, who ran off.

Now I have a question for the readers. Prior to reading chapter six, who would you side with: Sebastian or Tobias or neither? After reading chapter six, however, has your decision changed?

8/2/04 – Chapter Seven is up. Someone who's a part of Sebastian's new life makes an entrance, and a little more light is shone upon the lifestyle he's chosen.

- Shouldn't there be speech marks before 'My anger'? – Stefen (Chapter 6)
Fixed. I found a couple other boo-boos as well, so hopefully that's all, but I doubt it. Typos are insidious things.

And something I forgot to comment on a while back:

- I think change is good and though both Tobe and Seba have changed, they would still be perfect together! I assure you! They are like Vanyel and 'Lendel (if you haven't read the Last Herald Mage books by Mercedes Lackey, you really should.- Stefen (Chapter 4)
Years ago that was the very first book with a same sex pairing I'd ever read. The cover art had caught my eye (Jody Lee rocks), and to this day it's one of my favorites, partly because of nostalgia, and partly because so few mainstream authors are willing to write such things.

8/5/04 – Tobias is trying to reform his opinion of Sebastian, but meeting Tanya has introduced new and unsettling questions about the kind of people Seba and himself have become and whether reconciliation is possible between two people who seem so vastly different now.

- I think I like Tanya. – Spirit (Chapter 7)
I was wondering how people would receive her. I tried not to make her obviously likeable nor dislikable, but I suspected people wouldn't care for her much, yet I'm glad you like her.
- "I know," she admits quietly, starring at the floor. Shouldn't it be 'staring'? - Stefen (Chapter 7)
I fixed two incidences of the word "starring"
ddz008 Thanks bunches. I love crazy reviewers.

8/8/04 – Chapter Nine is uploaded. The worst of the obscenities and accusations seem to be over, but reconciliation remains a distant speck on the horizon. Despite what our head tells us, sometimes it's not with the brain that people think with, and the subconscious is quick to take advantage of that.

- I think I caught a typo. Thought I should point it out for you. ; "but there are certain forms of love that I away from.". – Mizery-Rose (Chapter 8)
- "I still love ice cream, and chocolate, and sunny days, and my job, but there are certain forms of love that I away from." I think you missed a word. :) – Stefen (Chapter 8)
I lost a "stay". It's back.
- … and by the way Hair is spelled with an h not air. - Sister of Hermione (Chapter 8)

8/12/04 – A couple of days have passed, and the phone rings again. It's another long distance call, but this time it's not Ethan on the other end, and the tables have turned. Chapter Ten is up.

8/16/04 – It's been a busy past few days, but it's update time again. In Chapter Eleven the day everyone's been waiting for has finally arrived, except Elizabeth's wedding isn't the only thing on Sebastian's mind.
Note that there are two POV changes in this chapter.

8/20/04 – Chapter Twelve – another rather prosy chapter I warn you – is uploaded. Seduction is a dangerous game, and sometimes you get a lot more than you expected. Reconciliation may be long overdue, but is this it?
Note that there is one POV change in this chapter.

- Random question: How do you pronounce the title of this story? When I'm talking about it with my friends it's really annoying trying to say the name. - Stefen (Chapter 11)
I started to put the pronunciations here, but there are more useful audio files at Just search for "lazuli" (part of "lapis lazuli") and "synecdoche" under Reference American Heritage Dictionary.
- Looking forward to the update. No complaints, but I did catch a typo earlier in the chapter. "...on my part that I manages to surprise him." – Misery Rose (Chapter 11)
Fixed. Thanks again for a having a sharp eye!

– Chapter Thirteen is posted! There was some traveling, some moving, and some home renovations, so that's why this update is so painfully, shamefully late. Sorry!

While it's not the most action packed, interesting chapter, it is an important transition, focusing upon the "morning after" and Tobias' perception and interpretation of that fateful night. For those of you who thought the last chapter marked their reconciliation and who screamed "NO!" -- ::dodges sharp pointy objects:: -- worry not. That'd be too nice and tidy and simple, seeing as humans are often irrational human beings. Enjoy.

9/9/04 – Back to more regular updates! It's Chapter Fourteen, and it looks like Fate has drawn Sebastian and Tobias back together. Face to face, they've finally got the chance to talk, assuming either wants to.

9/15/04 – Tobias is back in France, and life with Amon goes on, but he can't forget that night nor everything else he's learned over the last few weeks. He wants to put the past behind him again, but it's not as easy this time.

I'm going over the old chapters and fixed some typos in chapters 1 thru 5, 7, 9, and 10 and made a few minor changes. I also caught a typo in 14 ("mistaken" should have been "mistake") and fixed that.

9/27/04 – In Chapter Sixteen Ethan is back from his trip home. It's time for a homecoming, and Sebastian makes an important decision.
(I hope I remembered my Spanish correctly in this chapter. It's been awhile.)

10/15/04 – Sweet merciful… fudgebuckets; I've been trying to upload Chapter Seventeen since this Friday, but all I got was "file did not upload correctly" no matter what computer I used. Not even my friend could get it to upload! Anyway…

Several months have passed and the holidays are fast approaching. And with the holidays come some new plans and surprises in our boys' lives.

10/25/04 – After talking to a friend I realized it didn't make sense to toss in random French when both characters were speaking that language in a particular chapter, because it's supposedly translated into English for the reader but with the knowledge that they're really speaking a foreign tongue. So I changed those lines in 17 and will go back over earlier chapters to fix any other occurrences. However, in chapters where Amon or Ethan are speaking English I may sprinkle in the occasional French or Spanish. Did that make sense?

It's a couple weeks before Christmas, and Elizabeth decides Sebastian could use a little cultural refinement, and what better way to do that than a trip to an art gallery?

11/1/04 – I hope everyone had a happy Halloween. Chapter Nineteen gives Tobias and a certain someone a chance to have a private little talk together, and that someone isn't Sebastian.

- "Synecdoche", the title fits it beautifully, although to most passers-bys I image the meaning is lost"

Shouldn't it be 'imagine'?– Stefen (Chapter 18)
Fixed. Thank you.

11/14/04 – Due to increasing responsibilities in real life updates will now only be twice a month instead of every week.

And thus I present Chapter Twenty. In the last chapter Tobias got the chance to talk to Ethan, so now it's Sebastian's and Amon's turn, and you can bet Amon isn't going to be nearly as pleasant.

12/12/04 – Chapter Twenty One rings in the New Year, and with it old pains must be put aside. Only then can new resolutions be made.

- "Otherwise, can they get back together soon and make happy happy love, and I don't like Amon much, he's such a snob, and gives a bad name to us french (yes I'm french)," – Fountain Pen (Chapter 20)
::sweatdrop:: I was a bit concerned I might offend someone with the "stereotypical Frenchie" comment.

12/30/04 – A Merry Belated X-Mas, and here's a late present, Chapter Twenty-Two. A conversation begun on New Year's Eve continues, but when the ugliness of their pasts are brought up, old sins and old mistakes, can a fragile renewed friendship survive?

- "Oh and BTW, as someone who lives in san francisco, let me just tell you that the surfers will brave the pacific ocean no matter what the weather is like. They're INSANE!" – Fountain Pen (Chapter 21)
Californians I've always thought were a bit… nutters. Must be something in the water.
- "you wrote their emotions very well but towards the end of it so far, you seem to have over-done the description. Do people really describe which such complexity? It was ok, but the two characters seem very similar - intentional or not I don't know. " - midway confusion (Chapter 21)
I've been concerned about that myself and recently had a discussion about that very issue with a friend who helps me out. Both had been best friends for years then involved together, sharing experiences and hobbies, so it's not unreasonable for them to have behavioral and speech similarities, yet I do worry they start to sound too alike at times. I try not to think about that too much, however, or I'd fixate on that and never get the chapter done; I can be anal at time. ::laughs:: But maybe when LS is finished (only a few more chapters to go) I'll have time to go back and "fix" things. As for the descriptiveness, I don't think I reach the levels of someone like… say… Anne Rice, but keep in mind that we're dealing with an artist and writer.

1/10/05 – It's going to take me at least a week or two to remember not to write 2004. Anyway, let's open up the New Year with a new chapter. In 23 Tobias decides to give a belated Christmas gift to a certain blonde.

- Very good story. But I do have one question: is this the end? – eternally-yours (Chapter 22)
Not yet. The plan was originally for 30 chapters, but it looks like it may be longer by one or two at most.
- I thought your writing had matured a lot in Lazuli and it was very interesting to see these characters further down the line. - sandinmyhair (Chapter 22)
Thank you so much. It's good to know that someone thinks I've progressed in my writing.
- I have yet to seen another story that discusses love in all its unforgiving shortcomings and misleading promises, and I thank you for that. You're unafraid to dissect love and show its cruelties, as well as its wondsrous attributes. I love the honesty in which you portray these characters, they are real and have flaws and misgivings and I love them for that. - Larkspur8 (Chapter 22)
Life isn't all wine and roses, but nor do I like to push the angst. I'm glad you like it.

2/13/05 – It's been a month already Oo. Crap. I apologize again, but real life has been exceedingly busy and difficult of late. I do hope 24 was worth the wait, for in it Sebastian takes a trip overseas, but will he bother to visit Tobias while he's there?

4/20/05 – The good news is, Chapter 25 is up, and the next two are ready as well, so prepare for an emotional roller coaster as Tobias and Sebastian meet again in the City of Love, except there's one small problem, and it's name is Amon.

5/16/05 – Chapter 26 brings about unexpected revelations as Sebastian struggles to regain footing both in his own personal life and in his new relation with Tobias.

Back in chapter six I asked whom the readers sided with: Sebastian or Tobias or neither? Now I have another question. Considering the character development, who is your favorite character and why? Liz, Benjamin, Professor Flemmings, Seba, Tobe, Amon, Ethan, or Tanya?

5/31/05 – There are many kinds of love, and many levels of loyalty, and in Chapter 27 Tobias must figure this puzzle out.

12/5/07 - Sebastian realizes that to love others, you have to at least like yourself, and pain is a wonderful motivator.

12/8/07 - An ocean may no longer separate them, even but an inch can seem like a mile under the right circumstances. Can Tobias and Sebastian finally bridge that gap for good?

Thanks to all those who've stuck around and remember this story. I know how frustrating it is to get into a tale only to discover it's abandoned and unfinished. It's been tricky getting back into the swing of things, and I laugh and cringe a little at how melodramatic and florid I can be, but it's also fun. I'm really enjoying revisiting the boys, and I hope you do too. Theres only one more chapter and a bit extra left, so hang in there!

12/9/07 - It's all been said and done, but it's time to face the facts, to address the past, and decide upon the future. Could this finally be "Happily Ever After"?

Is this The End? Not quite...

12/10/07 - Epilogue. "True love doesn't have a happy ending, because true love never ends."

A Final Note :
Thank you for everything. Although I hate to say goodbye to the characters, their time had come. But, once again, don't think of is as "The End" but just "An End", and maybe, like an old friend, we'll see them again, be it a chance encounter at the bakery, passing on the street, or or a surprise encounter at a party.