Imperfect perfection

I'd love to say you're everything I ever wanted, but you're not
you're everything I hated
you're so damn smart, but god forbid you try
(I work my ass off for my grades)
and gays. ewwwwwwww
(my best friend and uncle are gay)
you're so normal, what is depression again?
(125 mg. of Zoloft, three therapists. that's me)
You don't call unless I tell you too
(I crave attention and worry you hate me)
You love your steak rare, and your culture kills live pigs
(Can anyone say vegetarian?)
You iron everything, even t-shirts!!!!!!!!
(How the hell do you work an iron????)

there's nothing
absolutely no reason why I should like you
I should want to pound your face in
but I don't want to
I wanna kiss you
and melt into your arms forever
I never want to leave you
I want to talk to you for hours
about nothing at all
learning new things all the time
hearing you use silly phrases
(I'll give you a buzz, mama, papa)
Listening to your "yugo" music
and your crazy theories

You have NOTHING in common
nothing to discuss
and how is he gonna react when you have a nervous breakdown
but these butterflies in my stomach
They appear
every time I hear you're name, or talk to you or think of you
(which is practically every second)
how often does this happen??
for all your faults you were raised right
(respect your elders, open doors for ladies)
and although you're not perfect for me at all
you are absolutely perfect