Fidget
I can't sit still, I never have been able to. I don't know what it is.
I am not really sure what peace and quiet is, because if I am not doing
something.
My mind is definitely not ever quiet. It always has to find some crap to
ponder on.
No wonder I am insane.And since the voices are not quiet, it means that I
am not getting any peace. I try to nap a lot , but the voices don't shut
up.
They make me impatient. I always want to go somewhere.
I think that is one of the reasons I need to learn to drive. But I never
have money.
How can I expect to have money for a car, and gas?
I hate living in poverty.
Maybe it will be better when there is no more school.
I am not sure though.
It drives me crazy. I get bored easily. I need something to do..I have to
be doing multiple things at once, too...Like I can't just listen to the
radio, I have to be sleeping, or writing, reading, or something..It drives
me crazy.
I have never been able to just do one thing though.
I am a multitasker at heart and I have to do a bunch of stuff.
At least it has gotten a bit better, I use to not be able to literally sit
still.
I would rock, or move constantly.
I do have the ability to sit in one spot with out jumping up, and running
all over the place now. But it is freaking hard. I want to do something.
Then, when I am doing something, then I want to do something else.
I must drive my friends crazy.
I am not like hyperactive, and I don't think I have ADD,
But I seriously think I have an attention span of a goldfish.
I can concentrate on things, sometimes even four or five things at a time.
It is just I get bored, but I am not a big risk taker,
So ways to relieve my boredom are not that many.
And this place is boring, and it makes me fidget more. Why did I want to
stay here?
Oh, yeah, have to finish this one thing then I can leave.
But I want to be done, and do something else, see some places I haven't
seen.
Oh, well, I guess I will have to learn to be patience.
One day, hopefully I will have enough money,
To do what I want to do.