EATING THE RIFLE

~~~

'What are you waiting for? Shoot him!'

I sighed and pulled the rifle back through the open window. Mary had her hands on her hips, annoyed. 'I can't.'

'Why the hell not?'

I looked down at the man in blue outside, standing at the letterbox. 'It's not fair.'

'Life isn't fair, David. Kill the man.'

'No.' I put the rifle on the wooden floor and walked across the room to the attic door. Mary picked the rifle up again and as she pointed it back outside, the window fell shut. She swore. 'David, get your wimpy ass over here and open the goddamned window.'

'No.'

Mary grumbled and opened the window, keeping one hand steady on the rifle I was far enough away from her not to be shot, but outside, the mailman was about to move on. 'What about his family?' I asked.

'Stuff his family,' was Mary's sharp reply. 'If he cared about his family he wouldn't be screwing me.' Mary pulled her rifle back inside, then shoved her head out the window. 'HEY! YEAH, YOU! YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT!'

'Mary.' It was pointless, I figured. Her yelling had never been music to my ears. I opened the door. 'David, where the fuck are you going?'

I looked back at the savage beast at the window. 'Why don't you just break it off with him like normal people?'

Mary stared at me and burst out laughing. 'David, where's the fun in that?'

I left and shut the door, shuffling off down the landing. Mary's voice continued to rattle on in the attic, and I clung to the barrier when the shot was fired. I walked out the backdoor and down the side street, not wanting to go past the decreased mailman.

Mary's doctor wasn't too far away.