Thorns

Like a fragrant flower
the pure simplicity
of your gestures of affection
of your signs of acceptance
fills my eyes with tears
at the beauty of our friendship.

Why then does it have to come to this?
Why do I fashion thorns to pierce my bliss?

Like tender sunbeams
your gentle understanding
falls on my needy soul
warms my tear-soaked petals
and bathes them in the solace
of suffering shared.

Why then does it have to come to this?
Why do I fashion thorns to pierce my bliss?

Like a strong rope the knowledge
that you want my affection,
accept the tokens
of tenderness my love creates
anchors my soul in gladness
amidst a sea of sad uncertainties.

Why then does it have to come to this?
Why do I fashion thorns to pierce my bliss?

Deep inside me there's a whisper,
buried beneath the scars of years:
it tells me not to trust a joy,
and holes each happiness with fears;
it says, 'you don't deserve such love,
somehow this can't be meant for you,
there must be something wrong with this,
such care for you just can't be true.'

That's why it always has to come to this.
That's why I grasp for thorns to kill my bliss.

12.9.04