Bravery

Bravery is simple

here

alone

with myself and the reflection that blurs

echo's

and

hardens.

I don't recognize it

I don't see me anymore.

Its been years sense I've studied myself

seen things reasonably

and opened my eyes

wide enough to see through my blindness.

Bravery is simple

but you'll find none of it here.

This thing that I see before me

myself

filled

and emptied

with perfection as well as flaw

is shaking

trembling

within the husk of absolution

and naive retribution.

I like to scream

in the middle of the night

just so that theirs a noise

to comfort myself.

I hate being alone

even though

my body feeds from it as though it had been starved

and just now nourished

inside the fog

of mediocrity.

Bravery is simple

except

in times like these.

Silence is the loudest thing in the world

when all you can hear are your own thoughts.

These thoughts tonight

burn through my hands like knifes through butter

and I'm alone again.

This reflection is torturing me

hanging

and handing me over to the other side

to be vacated

and witnessed again

touched with the hand of lies

and caressed with the tongue of deception.

Do you miss me when I'm like this?

Alone

and lashing out

at everything

and everyone.

The only sound that I hear is my own thoughts

and this

-these words-

is what they say.

Hush

my

tender

angel

all

will

be

fixed

by

tomorrow.

Please let me feel what it is to be whole

and myself again

and not a branch

fallen

and twisted

within the roots of another life

another girl

which I am not

never will be

never can be.

Let the world see that

I'm stronger this way.

Let me see

that I'm better this way.

I wont weaken

bend my knees

and fold my hands

to come back to that.

That,

was an ending

but this

I see now

could be my beginning.