I feel like crying, but I don't.
I want to forget, but I won't.
I want to leave, and still I stay.
I can't live my life this way.
I hear their voices in my head.
It makes me wish I were dead.
Too much pain, too many cries.
Too many reasons not to die.
There are too many tears I cry,
Far too many fears to justify.
Why can't I run? Why can't I hide?
Why can't I curl up and die?
Lie to me and call me names.
Make me feel like I'm to blame.
Make me hate and hurt and feel.
It doesn't hurt, this isn't real.
So love hurts, I heard it all.
It's better to live and love and fall.
So where is home and who am I?
There's always a reason to break down and cry.
I want to run, I want to hide.
Deep inside, I think I've died.
Forget the hurt, forget the pain.
Forget the loss, forget the gain.
I'll live my lie and never feel,
I'll cry, I'll scream,
I'll pretend it's real.
I open the curtains with my fake smile,
inside I'm screaming all the while.
I let in the light of day.
I don't want to die this way.