Chapter Two: And Therefore it Begins (Und deswegen beginnt es)
Geli immediately took to the Munich life. She loved going to operas and large parties. She was not shy in any sense of the word; she knew how to make everyone in the room look at her. For this reason I cherished her company even more. There were not many women whom I enjoyed taking out in public, but Geli was one of them.
I often took her with me to party meetings. She enjoyed these engagements very much so, possibly more than I did. Politics never interested her as they did me, but I suspect that she reveled in the company of so many young men. The thought still stings, for I know that the truth hurts. How could I expect her to notice me when there were so many handsome men her age? I felt overlooked, for lack of a better word. Still, despite these feelings of neglect, I radiated with pride whenever I introduced her. I had the misguided notion that was mine; only for other men to look at, never to touch.
Eventually, she began to integrate with my inner circle. The meetings amongst ourselves were once filled with pointless chatter and endless monologues, usually performed by me. But Geli's presence changed me somehow; I became relaxed and cheerful, like I never had before. Something about this young girl made me an amiable man, and lifted the gloom that formerly hung over my gatherings with friends. I noticed people approached me more openly, like they never had before. I was no longer the awkward young man sitting alone in the corner; I was what others would consider enjoyable. For once in my life, I had a taste of what was normal, and I wanted more.
One night, Geli and I walked to our apartment from the building where I had held a speaking arrangement. We didn't talk about politics or corruption in Germany, the topics towhich I was accustomed, but rather trivial things. We spoke of our favorite operas, dogs, and so on. She even shared gossip with me, which I found impossible not to laugh at. We giggled all the wayup the staircase, but attempted to quietourselves so we wouldn't wake Angela.
"I suppose it is time tosleep.", she whispered, still trying to recover her breath.
"I suppose.", I answered, my eyes cast to the floor.
When I looked up at her, a relatively new feeling struck me.My stomachdid flips and the palms of my hand became sweaty. I knew thisfeeling but never felt it sostrongly. It was desire. Not desire forthe salvationof the Aryan race or the desire for foodand shelter, but the desire for companionship. The desire to be loved.
"Uncle?", she asked cautiously.
I didn't answer her with words, but with a kiss. It wasn't so much a decisionas it was a compulsion. I didn't want her, I needed her.
We pulled away and she looked at me with those twinkling hazel eyes. She looked surprised yet serene at the same time.
"Good night, Adolf.", she whispered
"Good night, Geli."
As I walked into my room, all I could think about was her. I had fallen in love with my twenty year old niece.