I Live a Life of Wishes and Dreams

I live a life of wishes and dreams,
Not knowing one apart from the other,
Not knowing who I am or what I live for.
It's all meshed together in a colorful web-
White are the wishes, so pure as can be;
Blue are the dreams, that take me away;
Red are the lines, made to relieve;
Clear are the tears I've cried over life;
And gray is what's left of my life.

Wishes used to over-power it all.
As a child, that's all one could do.
As the years dwindled by,
Also did the white threads that formed my web.
Gradually they came back,
Fighting for a place to once again belong.
Wishes, they begged to be used-
To escaped…
And escape I did.

Dreams used to be there at night,
And dwindle at day,
But over the years,
It's grown clear that they don't only appear at night.
At points along the web,
The blue will grow dark,
To represent the nightmares that flooded my life…
Though if you put it into perspective,
My whole web should be dark blue.

Flipping through my childhood-
It shows that red has just been added to the colorful web.
Red is made once and a while,
To escape from it all;
To know what I am,
To show who I am,
To know where I belong.
It's done to me,
Yet affects so many people.

All the tears that I've cried-
There's just too much mesh to count.
Tears are more or less rare over the years,
But upon once found,
Tears splashing upon ground,
They rarely stop their salty flow for several hours upon end.
And as I say:
While crystal tears do nothing,
Let crimson tears do everything.

What's left of my ungodly life-
Is represented by gray.
Gray used to be my complete life-
With tinged colors here and there…
Now we're lucky if we see gray at all because
I don't live a life like you…
I live a life of wishes and dreams.