(what my heart would see in the looking glass)
This is where I found myself-
by the banks of a melody like
a river, in the deepest pools of emotions
that can't be bound by words. In a way, I am this
river, and I flow through time and wear away the landscape
with my life. In a way, this river runs through me, and
it gives me life. I cannot exist without emotion.
I sat by the edge and drank in a symphony perfectly
an adagio at forte,
a waltz, at pianissimo,
a fragile, simple joy going on and on---
a solo in a minor key.
Perfectly my own, and I gave my heart to it, my hands to it,
Clumsily trying to play the river's song, to go where
it could lead me.
This is where I learned patience.
My awkward grip could only hope to capture
a simple outline of my complexity,
a black and white rendition where I longed to
paint a rainbow with my six strings and lacquered wood.
Soon, soon, the emotions travel through my fingers, but
they are broken and
rearranged, and I am blind and helpless. The lesson is
to know each fragment, each jagged edge,
and finally know where each belongs.
This is where I wrote a song like
Heartache. I sat with my back to the setting sun
and the midnight moon was all I knew, and it shone
on my face as I sat curled around my solace, whose shape
was made to fit entwined with mine (or maybe mine to it)
the only love that never leaves- my melody. It has
no hands but soothes my tired heart with a light caress of
harmony, a deep and distant melody,
saving me from drowning in the ache of living.
It has no ears, but listens as I pour my tears into
a song that feels like it may break me. A melody grows and
I grow stronger.
This is where I sang in
Contentedness. Beauty and waterfalls all around me
amazed me, inspired a smile that
couldn't be contained, and a peace that couldn't be defined.
A song began in my heart and poured through me like
a river. I ran to tell the midnight sky, and finding only the sun
rising, I warmed my hands, and let life rush into them.
A tune rose in me until I was flying
with it, and it revealed a world whose splendor I could not describe,
a world I had known all along, but never seen. Then I sat,
near the river, with my companion-
a six stringed rainbow,
a sunset lacquer with a midnight finish,
soft curves fit only to my shape,
a song that I perfect, because
it is me.
I peered into the river, the deepest pools of emotions that
can't be bound by words, and
I saw myself- shadow and light,
A song and a broken heart,
A melody and a sigh of peace,
A guitar and hope, and
I have played ever since.