It was not so long ago that I was a different person.

My meaningless life was run by the game or the boy

or who said what to who about whom.

My clothes were bright and girly.

I only cared about myself and what people thought about me.

I was a mindless conformist.

You used to like me. You used to be happy with me.

Do you remember me then?

But something happened inside me,

a sudden change I can't explain.

My preppy looks and petty woes sicken me now.

I've left behind almost all of that life.

I hide now behind a shadow of black.

But my new, rough exterior is only beginning

of what's inside.

I'm broken. I can't even begin to describe the hurt and suffering

in this tiny insignificant thing that would be my heart.

My life is even more meaningless now.

If you only knew