Here I am, with my everlasting hug

A hug that I have never given

The walls muffle my cries

Convicted for words I had not written

Walls only cover the lies

Everyday I fight against this armor

They come and give me peace

I feel the old familiar sting

The shadows they bite me

Whiteness blinds me

The desperation rings

But the peace doesn't soothe

The mind, the thought, the life

No, they won't suck it out of me

They will not make me believe

I am not sick

I remember the day,

The shadows came and locked,

Locked me in this act of kindness

I did not, I did not!

No one allowed me to think

To say, to move, to be

They subdued me

Kindness, greetings,

I did not choose to hug

I did not choose to love

So why did they restrain me

I cant, I can't!

To take it away, yes

To take my life

Is a privilege I reserve to myself?

But they have taken it

The walls are soft

My head tilts back and forth

Thump, Thump

No, I want to quit

I want to let it go

The shadows will come

I must stop

Yes, I must wait

One day I will escape

The angel had said so

Until he comes back

I am prisoner of this hug

And, prisoner of the white armor.