"Ok, are you ready to finish our barely touched conversation?" Josh asked me grasping my shoulders and looking me straight into my eyes.
"Well, actually, Josh I really--"
"There's no use arguing! It has to happen!" He interupted.
"But wait Josh!" I tried to say.
"Tut! Tut! I won't hear another word! We are going to talk about this whether you like it or not! Don't make me sit on you and force it the words out of your mouth with a funnel!"
"You don't underst- a what!?" I said sharply with quite a bit of confusion mixed into my voice. "A funnel?! What does that have to do with anything?!"
"I have no idea--but see! It made you smile!"
"Josh if you don't listen to me--" Sighing, he cut me off by placing a finger on my lips.
"Carmen, you can't just avoid things that aren't comfortable! You have to realize that. Don't you see that this is the healthiest thing for you?"
"No! Not really! Josh I really--"
"Ok! That's it! You've done it! You've forced me to become agressive and take action!" With this he grabbed me around my waist, picked me up, and threw me over his shoulder.
"AHH!"
"Oh hush, child! It's not like I haven't done this before." he said opening the door and started walking out into the open area of the shopping mall.
"LET ME DOWN!"
"Get over yourself, girl. You aren't that special." At this I started to pound on his back with my fist, knowing that it didn't faze him one bit.
"JOSH IF YOU DON'T LET ME DOWN RIGHT NOW I'LL-"
"You'll what? Drool on me?" As he said that someone to the right of us whistled and Josh laughed as he pointed at me. In reply, the cat-calling man gave Josh a thumbs up.
"NO! I'LL! I'll.." getting as close as I possibly could to his ear I whispered "I'll...I'll pee on you.."
"Wait WHAT?! YOU'LL WHAT?! CARMEN, DID YOU SAY YOU WOULD PEE ON ME??" Josh shouted at the top of his lungs. The few people who were in the mall stopped their walking and captured us in their memories.
"Shhhhhhh! Be quiet!!" I tried to hush him.
"NO! WAIT! LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT: YOU SAID THAT YOU WOULD RELEASE YOUR BODILY FLUIDS ONTO ME?"
"Josh! What are you doing?! Why must you be so loud?" I said covering my face as best as I could as I blushed an awful shade of strawberry red.
As he concluded his humilation frenzie we were reaching his car in the farthest parking lot. That's right; ten minutes of pure embarassment. After refusing to hand Josh his keys for another five minutes I could feel my bladder screaming at me.
"I'M SERIOUS JOSHUA! IF YOU DON'T PUT ME DOWN RIGHT THIS INSTANT I WILL PEE ON YOU!!" Before I could squeeze a drop or two out, I was on my feet, the pressure on my over-flowing-bladder gone.
"Now, the only reason I set you down is because you have to promise that you'll come back as soon as you've finished your business."
"You think you can make me promise somethi-" And yet again I was up on his shoulder. "-ng like that...?! Joooooooshuuuuua! PLEASE?? I don't want to talk about it and I really have to peeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" I whined
"I'll only put you down if you swear you'll come back."
"Fine I swear, now will you put me down!!!?" With that Josh set me down for the second time and I ran to the first entrance of the mall. After about five minutes of bladder heaven, no I'm just kidding it was only like two minutes. But still the point being that after I had finished going to the resteroom, I slowly made my way back to Joshua in the parking lot. When I say "slowly made my way back" I really mean I went and stood in an ever long line for a cookie I didn't even like and then tried on five different outfits, went to the bathroom again, and finished my term paper. Ok! Maybe I didn't even touch my term paper. Let's just say I took quite a while to get back.