Spinal Tapdance

God, how much longer. I glanced at my watch, 12:30, great only 5 minutes since I last checked and about 5 more hours to go.

Who ever invented all day mating needed to die. A very painful drawn out death…preferably by me.

Come on focus, Bob couldn't talk forever, he eventually would be done. Damn this meeting. It had just been a steady stream of people since what 9:00?

We didn't even get to stop for lunch. We just ate it there at the damn table. Some people were still finishing up.

What was I even doing here? My boss said it was important for me to understand all parts of the company not just my job. But honestly, I didn't get anything. All off it just went strait over my head.

I began to nod off, got this was torture. I bit my lip. Anything to stay awake.

I was loosing the battle and my eyes were beginning to close.

Then my forehead began to itch. I reached up to scratch it and felt nothing. My hand went farther then it was supposed to. To where my forehead should have been. I frowned confused figuring boredom was playing tricks on me. I moved my hand farther and felt something squishy. What?

It began to push against my hand so I moved and my brain popped out.

Yeah, my brain. It was sitting there a big gray mass spinal column attached.

I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. I blinked several times but it was still there, just sitting.

I looked around to see if anyone else saw it but Bob was still yapping on and everyone else was staring at him with half closed eyes.

By now I was fully awake. What the hell was going on?

My brain started to move. My spinal column was pushing it forward like the back of a snail. I shivered when I heard the squishing sound and saw the trail of sludge it left behind.

My brain moved across the table till it got to the stapler.

My spinal column reached from behind my brain and grabbed the stapler.

I gasped as it stuck it right into the side off my brain and began to clack it.

My spinal column stayed wrapped around my brain so it ended up on the other side of the stapler.

Arms, I thought. They look like arms.

My brain grabbed a paper clip and bent it at a right angle and pocked in into the from and then grabbed another paper clip and did the same thing over again. Eyes? I swear they looked just like eyes.

My brain used its 2 arms to push itself over to were two pencils lay on the table. It grabbed one in each and stuck them underneath itself and stood up. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. This was crazy. Why didn't anyone else see it?

My brain walked across the table to a bowl of spaghetti. Left over from someone's lunch.

Lisa's lunch. God I hated Lisa, such a goodie goodie. She upstaged me at everything. And of course she was the only person paying attention to Bob.

My brain grabbed the bowl and put it on top of its head, spaghetti and all.

I couldn't help but let out a little snort.

Lisa glanced over at me with a disapproving look.

My brain then picked up a pen and moved to the middle of the table. It began to walk in a line one way and ten the other twirling a pen around.

I gasped shocked as I realized it was tap dancing. My brain was tap dancing.

It tap danced back to Lisa and began to do a jig right in front of her, waving its pen in her face but she didn't see it.

I tried to stop but giggles bubbled up inside me. Lisa looked at me again and I could see the disdain in her eyes.

Finally, my brain tipped its hat and took a bow. It left the bowl in front of Lisa.

It began to walk toward me, dropping parts as it went. The pencils fell of and it began to crawl, then the eyes, and so on.

Finally it reached me again and stood up on its spinal column so it was level with my head. It moved forward and wiggled into my head. I saw the spinal column slowly disappear as it dangled in front of my face. Finally my brain made it all the was back in and the top of my head snapped shut like it was on hinges.

…

Dr. Cross stared at the history sheet. He had worked at the Baltimore Medical Examiners office for nearly 15 years and had seen his fair share of perplexing deaths. This one looked like it was going to go to the top of the list though.

A healthy 25-year-old women drops dead at a business meeting. No marks on her body or anything to suggest why.

Only that at around 12:45 she was alive because a coworker, Lisa Martens, noticed her laughing and she was dead by 4:30 when the meeting was over. No one even noticed she died. Just assumed she fell asleep like everyone else.

Well only one way to find out what happened, Cross thought.

Everything looked normal and healthy till he got to opening the skull.

"My god." Dr. Cross stared at the women's brain. It was full of holes. Two small round ones on its underside. Two small pinholes in the front and a large gash in the side.

The end.