Whom It May Concern
To Whom It May Concern:
note is an afterthought, as I am already dead. I just hope I have
enough time to explain everything that is happening.
I have taken my life in atonement for the many lives that I have taken and destroyed in the past. This is not the first time I have thought about suicide; however it will be my only attempt.
I have taken an entire bottle of sleeping pills, and I have another waiting for me when I am ready. This second bottle is laced with cyanide. I take no chances and I will not fail.
I am an addict. I do not drink or smoke and I have never used any drug stronger than aspirin, until now. My addiction is killing. But, I am afraid of being caught, afraid of running any longer, and afraid of forgetting who I really am (I have used more names than I care to count). However, my biggest fear is to kill again. I have tried to stop several times before, but the need or desire (I don't know which) always returns. I am too weak to stop it.
As I have said, I have tried to beat this addiction. Unless you have killed before, you do not know the thrill. To see the life seep out of another man/woman/child's eyes, while my grip tightens around their throat, is incredible. The way a knife slices its way through clothing, flesh, and muscle, and the sound it makes when it scrapes against the bone, is absolutely exhilarating. I have killed in every way that I have found possible, from stabbing to strangling and bullets to bludgeoning. I have no preference. I love it all.
There is no help for an addict like myself. There is no patch, or gum, or twelve-step program. There is only willpower. Sadly, I am in short supply.
My name is Steven Williams and I am a death addict.
apologize, that is not funny, but humor helps me cope with myself and
what I have done. Guilt can be a powerful feeling, it has become too
much for me to bear, so I am ending it the only way I know. I am
writing this because I want to relieve myself of some of the guilt. I
do not want to carry this burden into my next life.
The authorities have found only 3 of my victims. There are many others. I have forgotten most of their name; however, I still see their faces on a regular basis. My dreams are filled with the faces of my victims. They are waiting for me in the afterlife. Waiting to judge me, waiting for revenge. I do not fear them.
Please forgive me; I have strayed from my point again. I am getting very sleepy. Anyway, my point is this; I want to give my victims back to their families. You may consider this to be my suicide note/confession/last will and testament. So here it is:
I, Steven Thomas Williams, being of sound mind and body, do hereby bequeath to the families of my victims, the following:
Hand drawn maps with the name and location of each victim.
2. The personal belongings of each victim.
3. A large sum of money (I'm not sure how much) to be divided
equally between the 38 families.
These are my last requests; please see that they are carried out. I am sorry for any inconvenience.
I am having a hard time keeping my eyes open, so I must finish this. Approximately 100 paces from the back door of my house, you will find a patch of tall thick grass. In the middle of the grass is a 6-inch steel pipe protruding from the ground. This used to be a dry well. About 30 feet down is a stainless steel box, please excavate this box. The box contains the previously mentioned maps, money, and personal items. I have also dropped some of the weapons that I used on my victims. I would suggest using a small crane to retrieve the box, and you will need something to open it.
I must go now; it is time to take my second bottle of pills. Please tell the families that I am truly sorry for what I am, and what I have done to their loved ones. Also, tell them that I am not a monster, but a normal man with a monstrous addiction.
Sincerely and with deepest regret,
Steven Thomas Williams