A Demon Sleeps in the Blender

By: Gabbyconcarne

Author's Note: Hello again, fellow creatures. I return with a new story to tell under my new penname. Let me warn you that this not light hearted like Shao. This is dark comedy. If you are one who can't take humor that will go to lengths such as running kittens over with speeding trains or any other method of death that could be ironic or blunt, then this is not the story for you. Still don't catch my drift? I'll make it simple: If Invader Zim or A Series of Misfortunate Events disgusted you, you probably won't like this. I will update as often as possible however, after tonight's post, don't expect another chapter up until the 19th or the 20th for I will be out of my house for furniture market (don't ask). Enjoy the story and remember to review after you're done reading, fools. Ta! Gabbyconcarne

Disclaimer: Just try it, bitch. Just try it…

Prologue

This story came from the diary of a student who attended Grinsville Junior High School. The diary was found in the locker of Alice Janet Fooge by the construction crew while salvaging through the aftermath of the Unspoken Disaster.

The Unspoken Disaster occurred when not only did a truck filled with human sewage slam into a side of the school but a plane crashed through the roof as well. The plane was brought down by a flock of Canadian Geese that smashed into an engine, setting the wing ablaze. After the mayor enforced a no-geese and a no Canadian policy as well, he sent a crew to dig through the remains of the crumbled school. Alice's locker was quite dented yet the diary remained perfectly intact.

The whereabouts of Alice Fooge at this time are unknown. The school janitor found the diary and, with the help of those who were close to Alice, has turned it into the story that follows this page. Whether these accounts are real or not is in question. Alice Fooge was a notorious loner who could have just been a complete loon and, driven by loneliness and insanity, wrote this diary for her own amusement. Or, maybe, just maybe, it's true. The choice is yours.