Everything is finally catching back up to my superficial thoughts

I thought that I had finally gotten away from all the bullshit

That somehow as I got older things would change

But I was wrong; I mean I should be used to it by now

I'm not

I don't think that I ever will be

Change kills

Maybe that's why I'm still clinging.

Not really though, it's not a strong grasp anymore

Just this steady pull

It's awkward and insistent

Are you ready to move on with me?

I didn't think so

I don't blame you, no worries you won't have to blame me either

It's a big clock, I'm living in

Or perhaps it's really all just my death that keeps replaying in my mind

Maybe I'm just waiting for what's left

I think that leaving near all this is finally getting to me

I try to remain distant but something wants to stay attached

I won't fucking cry anymore for you and your bullshit

I kind of wish you would leave

Because I know that I can't go anywhere anymore

Everything is tying me down

So fuck off you ass

I have better things to do with my time

It's all just a replay of the past events

I'm still stuck in rewind

And I don't want to be here anymore

Hell I don't even know where here is

My brain is filled with clich├ęs

Because my own words have been taken from me

I'd ask for it all back but it's a waste

Just as it always has been

And sometimes I just want to say that I am done with this

Maybe I'll disappear tomorrow

Or even better I'll completely crash

And no one will be there to witness and help

The door is locked now,

I am almost positive I brought the key back in with me

It's unbreakable and irreparable at the same time.