Inappropriate Desires:


Sexual Exploits of Randomly Selected Persons (S.E.R.S.P.)


Chapter 2: My New Lab Rat



See that guy over there?

-:Uh-huh. And?:-

You have much better gaydar than me. Any homosexual waves coming from him? Cause the guy's jeans are waaayyy too tight.

-:Umm… Let me check him out first… -beep beep zip zip zip- Tucker Finnigan? Hell no. He's one of guys in the exchange student group from Oklahoma. The farm guys. I think he fucks animals, not girls. And sadly, not guys too.:- (1)

Oh okay. Asexual.

-:Maybe he fucks guy cows. Wanna ask?:-

No thanks Sugar.

-:Oh okay.:-

Now scan the crowd for potential homos.


Any luck?

-:Wait… what about the guy in the bright green polo? He looks promising.:-

Which guy?

-:The guy leaning against Harver's door watching the students.:-

That guy looks homo!?


But he's too… masculine… to be gay.

-:Obviously, you didn't see Katie rub up against him.:-


-:She was trying to flirt with him and came up to him, shoving her plastic boobs in his face. But he excused himself and pushed her away. Best moment of this day. Hah.:-

The feeling's mutual. But he probably saw the neon pink toxic nipples under her boob tube. I mean… it's unnatural.

-:Yeah. Disgusting. I'm perfectly content with my A-cup, thanks.:-

I'm B. But I'm okay with it too.

-:How did we end up talking about our boobs?:-

No idea. The guy?

-:Yeah. Where's he now?:-

He's not there? Then… ARGH… The stupid idiot just went in Harver's lair.

-:Is he trying to get himself killed?:-

Possibly yeah. But what's his name?

-:No data. Already checked. New kid?:-

That'll be cool. I could try and befriend him and find out his address.

-:Are you trying to stalk him or seduce him?:-

With this body? Are you nutters? No. I wanna stalk him, just to see how big his dick is.

-:Woah… sicko.:-

Oh shut up Sugar. I know what you're actually thinking.

-:You got me. Wanna follow him into the office?:-


-:Duh. To try and find out his name. How the hell can to track someone down without his name? I need that for my records.:-

Oh. Okay. But how?

-:Say that Mr. Johnson needs more staplers or something.:-


-:Soo… are you gonna go in?:-

You kidding? I'm certainly not. You go in Sugar. You're some kind of invisible entity on my shoulder. I'm sure you can easily float through walls or something.

-:Uhh… I'm just an invisible author looking at you through a telescope.:-


Oh well… I guess I have to go in. Thanks a lot Sugar.

-:Hey! Don't blame me!:-

Okay okay. Lemme suck in a well-needed breath. Hmph. Let's go!

Stepping lightly to the demeaning door that looked more like a castle's entrance, I fingered the piercingly cold knob and twisted it and pushed it open slowly… The cold sterilized air blasted fully at my craning face, almost sending me toppling back into the shuffling crowd behind me. Dammit! Cold!

Shivering rather violently, I stepped inside and peered around through quivering eyelashes. Mrs. Janice or something merely raised an eyebrow at me and went back to her book. From what I could see, the cover had a barely clothed red-haired woman with this guy in a tight black suit with ruffles.

Eww… hetero trashy romance novel.


I was standing there, in a shockingly freezing room, seemingly lost and confused. I mean… I don't know where to go or what to do. Mrs. Janice or something was ignoring me and I didn't want to knock on the doorway to doom, which in reality was Harver's door.

Luckily, I didn't have to decide what to do, because the door opened and he walked out. Yes… him. The totally hot guy from earlier. Harver's voice called out from inside about something like '1st period in room 237'.

Huh? That's my room!

Yayness! He's gonna be in my class!

He just nodded and thanked Harver before turning back to exit the office. He took notice of me and smiled slightly, almost rendering me unconscious and left.

And through all this… I just stood there and gaped like an idiot. Go me.

-:-slapping- Wake up! Lili! Hello? Is anything registering?:-

Uhh… yeah… Umm… why am I here again?

-:To stalk the new guy who just left.:-

Oh okay… and what am I supposed to do?

-:Are you being stupid? Follow him to class of course!:-

Uh uhh… okay…

-:God… what a ditz.:-


First period. Algebra. The hated algebra.

Haha…. Not for me.

Sucks to be you.

-:Make her shut up. She's a math genius and she just won't stop rubbing it in into math failures all around the world.:-

Sugar… you're one too.

-:Oh yeah… I forgot.:-


Today, I arrived into class a bit too late. But that was okay. I never actually cared about my classmates in this class anyway. It was supposed to be a sophomore class or something. I got moved up due to my father's recommendation. But the administration got me here. Thanks a lot.

This class might be a sophie class, but it consists of brainless and failing jocks and cheerleaders and some flunking goths or druggies.

I don't actually fit in any of the groups here. I don't really mind. This class is so fucking easy, I can sleep here or write something and still answer questions on the board.

Sliding in my seat at the edge of the room, I laid back against my chair to observe my surroundings out of habit. Everyone was up and about, talking amongst themselves of topics unimaginable. Or of topics I don't want to hear. The teacher wasn't there.

Sighing, I rubbed my temples to try and ease off the pressure from all the ruckus beside me, when the door was flung open.


Oh my god.

I was the guy earlier. Nameless guy I will call him. He was standing still, one hand pushing lightly against the door, the other clung to the single strap of his backpack on his shoulder.

The students fell quiet all of a sudden, waiting for his first move.

He merely raised his eyebrows up and under the long fringe of hair that was poking into his eyes and smoothly and fluidly made his way through the cluttered desks and their occupants.

The students, relieved that the 'person' wasn't the teacher resumed their idle (and not so idle) chatter. But the guy didn't really care about them. He chose the empty seat right behind me and squatted down before pulling out his textbook and notebooks. I noted silently that they were all color-coded to each and every subject he supposedly had and they were all the same type, size and everything.

Neat freak probably.

He looked up and right at me in the middle of uncapping his pen. "Where are we?"

I was quite startled from his sudden question. "Uhh…" What? "The school?"

-:My god… that was stupid.:-


He chuckled lightly. "No. I meant where we were left off in the book." He pointed at the book to prove his point and make me look even more retarded. Way to go Lia… embarrass yourself in front of a cute guy on his first day at school.

Shut up Sugar. Stop putting self-depressing thoughts in my head.

-:No can do.:-

"Uhh…." Goddammit! Why can't I say anything other than 'Uh'!? "I don't really know cause Dad gave up trying to teach the class. And I don't know where the substitute with teach."

Yes! Two full sentences!

"Dad?" Again, the eyebrow raise.

"Yeah Dad. He's my teacher. Or ex-teacher." Why am I blurting out all of this to a stranger? I don't even know his name! "He got moved up to be the vice-principal when Mr. Sonners got fired from too many complaints."

-:Hehe… YES!!!:-

"So this class is…" He trailed off, thoughtful. "… wild?"

"You could say so." I reply honestly. "Cause some of the worst stoners and beefiest jocks are all in here along with the math-failing cheerleaders. I don't know why I'm in here."

"Oh god…" He groaned and his head of ruffled black hair fell down on top of his closed book with a dull thud.

I almost panicked at the situation. "Don't worry. I don't think they'll bother you. I don't think that there are actually bullies here. Not many brave jocks. But I pity the substitute though."

His head rose up a little bit and he gave me a weak smile. "You don't get it do you?"

"Huh?" I was… in short words… perplexed.

"Wish me luck." With a weak smile, he pushed himself up and began stuffing things back into his bag again. The squeak of his chair that was pushed back attracted the attention of a nearby bimbo and she gasped stupidly when she saw his ultimate gorgeousness. You just noticed? Too late girl. He's already gone.

He strode purposefully to the front of the class and dropped his books down. Everyone just eyed the weird new kid for a moment and began chatting again.


The sound of a yardstick slapping the wooden surface jolted everyone out of their conversations and they all turned to look at the imposing figure at the front of the class, arms crossed.

"Okay. Now. Class. All of you stand up." He commanded in a very serious voice. Not to mention, intimidating. The class reluctantly shuffled themselves into some resemblance of order. With lots of squeaks from chairs. I hate squeaks.

"I am Mr. Clymer and I will be teaching this class for unfortunately the rest of the term." The guy continued, eyeing each student carefully.

A sophomore in front of me muttered softly. "Oh shit."

-:Yeah. Oh shit.:-

"You, girl." The yardstick was suddenly pointed straight at me. "Sit down."

I lowered myself carefully into my chair, along with the air-headed girl in front of me. But Mr. Clymer snapped sharply at her. "Not you. Her."

The girl turned red, much to the delight of some guys at the back, and quickly stood up, but not before shooting me a dark look.

What did I do?

Mr. Clymer was oblivious to what had happened, because he was busy drawing a square grid of the board. "These will be your respective seats for the rest of your year." He announced, moving back from his drawing to look at the class again pointedly. "Except…" he raised a clipboard up to squint at it momentarily. "… Liana Carton. The rest of the you will sit according to these numbers. Number 1 sits nearest to the door. Sean Arbor…" And thus began the grueling process of moving every single unwilling kid (Yes, kid! These people never act like the proper teenagers they're supposed to be…) in the room.

All except me.

What did I do!?

-:Psst… Lia…:-


-:The guy's perfect! I mean… the perfect lab rat! Please! I beg you! Take him!:-


-:Mr. Clymer!:-

A/N:Okay… that was weird… But just an introduction to Mr. Clymer. He's supposed to be a cool guy. And the perfect candidate to Li's experiment thingy or something. I'm not even sure myself.

Sorry if this took too long. I was working on NAP and HMHM. They require sooo much work…

ShadowPharoh: Aww… poor you… prudy guys suck! I mean… what's the main purpose of having a dick if you're not using it!? Uhh… sorry… over-reacting. But yes. Of course… porn is awesome. If the world had no porn… I'd be living on Mars. Hopefully they have some little green Martian porn or something. Oh… and I suppose there'll be some smut in here or something. A little peek and KK's relationship? I'd love that.

Vampyre-lover0666: No worries. It ended anyway. But it was true though. I can type your name by memory. Cool. But I just re-read Kev and Ken's conversation thing up there and man! Did I really write that!? That was awesome!

Look at me… I'm complimenting my own work. I suck!

Hitori-Hoshi: It's not that good though… but why do I get more reviews for that story? I'm still trying to figure that out… I don't know… I think the story was too boring and it only circles around the two characters. But it's not gonna be redone for quite sometime.

Sexy-tease: Nah… I just don't like leaving my characters. It saddens me… Boo hoo… Kids are annoying. There are currently 4 in this room including me. Too noisy to work. But I'm not that keen on writing a girl-girl relationship yet. I love gay guys too much. And keyboard noises aren't that annoying! I listen to them all the time!

Broadway Doll: Okay… first thing. Caesar was a dork. I don't really like him for reasons still unknown. Maybe it's because of the 'Caesar salads' that were named after him. Weird though… Secondly, I love Kev's and Ken's personalities. They're really easy to type out! And besides, Kev and I always have this little feud between us anyway. God… I'm acting as if they're really real people. And Li's just as crazy as her brother… I hope… She should be nice review material.

Youdontknowmyname: Double talking's nice. Killing two birds with a stone. But anyway… the thank you was my pleasure cause it's too cute for me too! And cola's easy to struggle out of and hope you like this story. Hey! Triple talking!