Who are you
To make me feel this way?
Who are you
To haunt my every day?

You sit in the shadows
Lurking in the corner of my mind
How I feel about you
I can never seem to find.

One minute I love you
The next I hate you so.
Sometimes I wish so hard
That you would just go.

And now that time is drawing near
And instead of relief, it's only invoking fear.
I feel so guilty, I wished you were gone
And now that you're drifting
My heart sings no song.

I love you
I hate you
I want you to live
I want you to die.
None of these feelings are the full truth or lie.

I want you to see me graduate in May
And yet I want our last conversation to be today.
I told you I loved you,
Let's leave it at that
I don't want the future to merge with the past.

It's too late for any of these feelings to change
Maybe it's time that I realize that whatever I think is simply in vain.
It's not my fault if she lives or if she dies.
Nature will take its course without my input.

Coming so soon after so much time.
I wait in this grey room inside my head
Sometimes I wish I never got out of bed.
I don't want to deal with these feelings, not yet
But no matter how hard I try, I always seem to fret.

I love you
I hate you
I want you to live
I want you to die.
None of these feelings are the full truth or lie.

Make me deal.
Don't make me deal yet.
The choice is not mine to make.
Sooner or later, I'll learn my fate.