I wondered what I would do next. I knew everyone else already had their plans: Lysandra was going to travel around and learn about herself. Onofre was going back to the army to fight or something. Cyril was going to be king, and Da-Xia was going to stay with him.
I guess I could go home, but I didn't want to. I felt like home was all wrong for me all of the sudden. Once, when I was little, I lost my favorite doll, and looked for it all over the place. I cried for days, but then, I forgot about it. A few months later, I found it, but I didn't care anymore. I wondered if I'd be like that doll if I went home now. After all my adventuring and travelling, I knew I wouldn't like doing nothing in the village, and I figured nobody wanted me back anyway.
I figured I could stay with Da-Xia and Cyril for a while. They were sure to take good care of me, but eventually, I would want to move on. Maybe I could get a home of my own in a city, or on a mountaintop, or anywhere. Or, I could travel the world, like Lysandra, or learn to fight like Da-Xia.
I guess I really could do whatever I wanted.
Lysandra was leaving. I tried talking to her. She wouldn't change her mind. I guess she really wanted to leave.
I watched her go away. I could see her out my window in my room. I waited for her to turn around and come back. She didn't.
I guess I knew then that I had to go back to the army. It felt kind of funny. Like I was trying to turn back time or something. I figured I'd get used to the old way soon enough. Seeing my friends would be nice.
I stood before my mirror. I have never imagined myself a vain woman, but I had to admit that I believed I looked very attractive in my new uniform. It had been specially cut and designed for me because there were no female uniforms.
I drew my sword, and relished the scratching sound it made against my new scabbard. Slightly embarrassed by my actions, I spun around and halted, my blade pointed at my reflection. I looked incredible.
I realized what I was doing, and straightened up after a moment. Such silliness would not be tolerated by the men I hoped to command. The feat ahead of me did not seems so impossible, however, as I resheathed my sword.
Only a few people applauded after the astonished gasps. The people obviously had been shocked to learn that they would suddenly readopt a monarchy, but at least nobody seemed particularly offended or angry.
I would need time, however. Too many people are too familiar with stories of heartless tyrants, and know too little of our great kings. Perhaps I would need to set the standard and inspire more stories of greatness.
I think the reason I didn't stay with Onofre was because he was a man, and because he was a man, he reminded me of my brother. I know that wasn't fair to him, but despite all the healing Gyula had given me, I still had a long way to go. I might never feel romantic feelings for any man.
I wondered if I would ever see Onofre again. Perhaps all was for the better if I didn't. I wanted to see Abeni, though, and Cyril, and Da-Xia, who knew my secrets now. I might come back and visit them some day, but not yet. I had too much to see.