Vibrating from each of my walls.
I observe this from where I sit on my bed against the back wall of my room. My knees are pulled up tight to my chest, and my chin rests on them as my arms pull my body together. I am just tired, short on energy.
Everything in front of me is a mess. Clothes, paper, school, reality. So I'll just sit and wait for a shift in the fabric of time. My clock ticks by another minute. I think something moved on my light-green walls, but I am not focusing.
Then, again a wave a silence passes through.
When the house is empty like this and I am home alone, silence is my worst enemy. The way it makes you feel alone. The way it leaves this huge space and expects you to fulfill it. Silence wrapped around me like a thick coat and choked my voice like a thick fog.
That cat did not utter a purr. The dog did not so much as swish her tail.
So, I sat. Sat and waited. The phone announced no one's call. Buying groceries was not supposed to take this long, my mother and sister should be back by now! Dad was at work, and would not be home until late. Alone I sat and waited.
My mind began to meander in its endless dusty corridors. Impassive face, just a blank stare as I think.
The noise of the front door did not even disrupt my meditations….