She sat the table in front of her was a letter that he had written to her. There was also her phone, which was vibrating wildly and she knew it was him. He would say what he always had for the last week, "Are you trying to ignore me?", "Are we over or not!?" and the most lurid question, "I actually love you, did you mean it when you said that you loved me to?!?" . She read the letter again, while her CD player blared on in the background-playing Blink 182. It was forbidding for her to read. She wanted to put it down, but she couldn't pull her eyes away.

Dear Lizzy,

I still love you and I want to work this out. I'm depressed since I miss your kisses and I can't touch you, even in my dreams. I wish that my now cold hands could be warmed up with yours. I don't know what had come between us. When you see me you don't even connect eyes with me. Will you just tell me what is wrong. I always wanted it to not be a lie when you said that you loved me. I now am coming to the realization that you probably never did.

Sincerely and with love,


Her heart was heavy with despair. She never did mean it when she said that she loved him. She never wanted to say it, but their fights were always so brutal and when she said it he would kiss her with all the passion in the world. She was really starting to deceive herself, she was starting to really believe that she did love him. But when she saw him after he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her she finally got out of her allusion of a relationship. She would have to tell him eventually how she felt, but why did he have to say his first?

She put her head on her shoulders that were now crossed on the table. When she closed her eyes her phone stopped vibrating. She fell into a deep sleep and had a dream about the forbidden one. He was on the lacrosse team and had a pierced ear, which she had always loved. When he looked into her eyes and talked she could barely stop herself from giggling at everything he said. This is truly what had started the problems in her relationship with Tom. When she first saw him all of her feeling about Tom completely disappeared. She had met him through her friend, Sherri, and she and Lizzy had come to the conclusion that Derek was better for her than Tom. It's not that Lizzy hadn't discussed this with Tom, but he didn't understand it when she said "we aren't seeing eye to eye about this relationship." He had just stood there looking at her and acting as if it never happened the next day. She suddenly opened her eyes knowing what she had to do about this. She got up and grabbed her car keys and her new jacket. She slipped the new jacket on that felt like Derek's arms when he had pulled her close to her and kissed her troubles away when she was crying about Tom. She got into her Jetta and backed out of the driveway. Without thinking she started driving to Derek's house, but then she remembered that she was going to drive to Tom's house. She turned around and found his house. She got out of her car and knocked on the door. Tom answered the door and she knew that she had to talk.

"We need to just break up. I never did love you. I am very sorry that I lied to you, but I had to. Please don't call my house again, okay? I don't think it will be good for us if we become only friends. In this case we can't be anything. I'm sorry I ever played with you, it was extremely cruel and wrong of me." She turned away so that he couldn't see the tears brimming on the edges of her eyes. She got into her car as it started to rain and left him there as he cried and was soaked by the water that was now pouring onto his body. Maybe she had loved him, but it was too late now.