i don't know how to love you anymore

with your sad eyes and familiar apologies

i don't know how to love the man i saw last night

drowning out his sorrows

drinking to ease the supposed pain

and then the world shifted

and i was the enemy

i don't know how to love a man

that leaves bruises down my arms

on my back

from hitting the wall as i flew backwards

i don't know how to love that kind of man

not even a man

just a scared little boy who took out his rage

on my tanned skin and fear

you're sorry

i can see that in the way you stand

guilty, confused, lost

fighting the urge to walk towards me

knowing i'll just wince away

i'm afraid of you

i don't know how to love someone i fear

i don't know if it was really love

all i know

is that last night was Hell

and i refuse to believe love means pain

i deserve more than that

i don't know how to love you anymore