'She stirs, the Lady stirs', he mumbles to himself as he leaves for the catacomb.
Silence. Footsteps echo in the dusty tomb as he emerges into the soft glow of the candles as they surround her body-a true angel on earth. He walks around the platform where her body rests- still beautiful; even in death.
'Ah Juliet, why art thou yet so fair? Am I to believe insubstantial Death is amorous? That he keeps thee here-dark to be his paramour.'
His dark head bent low as if in silent prayer, he whispers all he wishes to say in intangible phrases never heard by his true love.
'Eyes look your last; arms take your last embrace...' Tears roll down his fine features-and you see how young he is- only about seventeen. His eyes are focused on her once more-never leaving her peaceful face. She, too, is young, about fifteen or so. Such a tragic end for someone so young.
He moves towards the exit of the catacomb, retrieving a bag and proceeds to rummage through it. Extracting a 32-caliber gun and a vile of recently-aquired poision, he places both these items on the edge of where his love lay.
Romeo suddenly stops- sounds are comming towards him and they're fast-approaching. In his momentary distraction, he misses seeing Juliet's hand slowly move...she's waking up. He turns back to Juliet's still form, and takes a few deep breaths- its now or never. Picking up his gun, Romeo puts it to his temple and takes a deep breath.
Through eyes half-blurred with sleep and her mind slowly waking, Juliet sees Romeo and smiles-until she realizes what he's about to do. With all her stregnth, she moves her arm and forcably nudges him.
Startled, the gun slips from his grasp as his eyes adjust to try and make sense of what he's seeing. Juliet is alive? The gun lays forgotten on the floor as he sweeps Juliet into an embrace, tears streaming down his face as he does so. Juliet finds her voice and cries aloud as he rocks her gently-still unable to believe he's really holding her again.
I hate to break it to you, but in Romeo and Juliet, Romeo's only fourteen or fifteen (it doesn't say his age, but he's REALLY young) and Juliet is MOST DEFINITELY thirteen (it says so in the play).
But this is a perfect ending to something so tragic. You wrote it well.
I respect that you like Romeo and Juliet; I think it's got great humor in it (like in little jokes from the middle ages) and it's well-written. It's got a cool plot, too.
But it's a little crazy. I mean, Romeo just wanted Rosaline's virginity, and she denied him; that's why they weren't together anymore. And then he saw Juliet and lust got the better of him. And then Juliet acts on impulse too much--she tells Romeo that she wants to be wed--WITHIN twelve hours of meeting him! And they make out, like, 45 times. And then, behind the scenes, Shakespeare doesn't write about it, but we KNOW that they're doing MUCH worse. It's implied in the movie from the 1970s, at least.
I dunno...I don't think DiCaprio made a good Romeo. I think someone like...like a young, VERY serious (that's scary actually...) Ashton Kutcher could've made a good Romeo. Someone hot who can act...
I think your portrayal is good, though. I like this ending. I love your short stories! They're so awesome--they end leaving a cliffhanger...but this one left you knowing that everything will by okay for a second or two--until people find the lovers in the chamber...