Without you

Summary: Marie loved him all her life as he did her. But now it was over and she was left with a broken heart and saddened memories.

The fog surrounded her as she walked up the bridge; it was such an old thing but she found such peace there. No one was ever around; she could be alone and think. But most of all she hurt because being there reminded her of what she lost, the man she loved for so long.

He had promised he'd be back but Marie knew that wouldn't happen, it was a deep feeling in her chest that let her now it was really over. She looked around at the trees and vines surrounding her and the old style houses she once spent hours staring at.

Marie felt tears stinging her eyes as she thought of the last time she saw him, it was on that bridge. She placed her hands over her growing belly and closed her eyes. She couldn't stop the thoughts that came and she didn't want to because it was all she had left now besides the child inside her he had given her the night before he left.

"It's late Jonathan why are you bringing me out here?" Marie softly asked, she knew this town like the back of her hand but it still scared her at night.

"What better place for us to be alone?" Jonathan asked. "The party was great but now I just want to be with you." he whispered once he wrapped his arms around her.

Marie rested her head back against his chest and crossed her arms over his. "I hate that you're leaving, it's unfair." She expressed trying not to cry again.

Jonathan kissed the curve of her neck but nothing he did would change the fact he would be leaving tomorrow. "Marie once this is over we can be together forever. Just hold on to that and the time will fly by."

"What if you get hurt?" Marie asked voicing one of her biggest fears about him going off to fight a war.

"I'll be careful." Jonathan promised. "Nothing will stop me from getting back to you." he tightened his grip around her and wished time would just stop, he wanted to stay with her right there forever.

Marie looked down at her hand resting on his. "I can't believe we got married last night. I thought my folks would be upset but they were happy even threw that party." She said, bringing a new smile to her face. Everything was going so well, it all seemed perfect until she thought of Jonathan leaving tomorrow morning.

"They knew like we did that we're together forever, it doesn't matter we're only eighteen. Once I get back we can live the life we've always wanted together." Jonathan said as a comfort to the both of them. He didn't want to tell her how scared he was to go and how scared he was he'd never see her again.

"I'm sorry I can't say goodbye to you tomorrow morning when you leave." Marie said now.

"Don't worry about it, you're family needs you. We'll be together again soon. And right now this is the best goodbye I could ask for." Jonathan said as he turned Marie around to face him. "I love you." every time he looked at her face he just had to say it but the words couldn't compare to the joy he felt in his chest.

Marie had tried to fight the tears welling up in her eyes but she couldn't, they began to fall as she place her hand along his face. "I love you too."

Jonathan smiled as they leaned their foreheads against each others. "We can't stay out here forever." He hated to point out but it was already so late.

"I know, just a few more minutes."

Marie wiped the endless tears off her cheeks as best she could. Eight months had passed now, he had written all the time but last week the letters stopped. Marie didn't want to believe he was gone but the darkness around her heart told her the truth even if she didn't want to believe it.

She ran her hand along the railing of the old bridge and wished times were as simple as they use to be. As children she and Jonathan played there all the time, throwing rocking into the lake beneath the bridge. When Fall came they would collect the different leafs from the tree and make different pictures and leaf jewelry. The memory caused her to smile as well as cry more.

Jonathan ran across the bridge right to the middle where she had been sitting. "What is it?" a young Marie asked.

"It's a necklace, I glued the leafs to the string, it's for you." Jonathan explained as he put it around her neck.

"But I didn't make you anything." Marie said with a frown.

"That's ok just wear this for me."

Marie wore her leaf necklace for months after that. Other kids said it was stupid but she didn't care, she liked it. She knew even at seven years old that Jonathan was the one for her. She ran her hand over her stomach again and felt a kick. "I promise I'll tell you everything about him and all the things I know he would've done with you."

Marie forced herself to walk away and head back home. Every little part of town reminded her of Jonathan and times they spent together.

As she neared her home she saw the unfamiliar car and then the uniformed men standing on the porch. Her mother was talking to them; she looked at Marie right into her eyes. Marie felt her heart stop when she saw her mother's red tearful eyes, and regret. Regret that Marie had come home now.

She began to walk faster until she reached the porch. The two uniformed men looked at her. "No please don't tell me its true." She sobbed.

"I'm sorry ma'am for you loss. He died saving another officer's life, he died a hero." One of the men said.

Marie didn't want to hear this, she couldn't handle it. She turned away from them and ran away. She had felt it she knew he was gone but she had some hope now there was none. He would never come back; he would never know their child.

The bridge wasn't too far from her house. She had ran all the way now she slowed down because of the ache on her side. She walked up the overpass, the long branches brushing her skin.

Marie stopped at the middle of the bridge and placed her hands on the rail. "I love so much Jonathan." She sobbed as her eyes focused on the ripples of the lake. "You gave me so much and so much to remember. I'll never forget that but it's not enough!" she yelled. "I need you damn it how dare you leave me all alone?!" she slid down the railing and sat on the hard surface and continued to sob. "How am I suppose to go on now? You promised you'd come back."

Marie felt her heart break into tiny small pieces but she couldn't let it take over. She still had their child to worry about. She forced herself to stand up and face the pain. She looked past the lake now at the setting sun. "I wish you didn't go I wish you were here. I'll never love anyone the way I love you. Goodbye Jonathan."


Isabelle A.