I woke up with his arm around me.

My immediate response was me shoving it off and me getting out of the damn bed before my hormones kick in. I breathe heavily, putting my hand over my heart.

God. What happened last night?

The most I remember is having a wet dream… and then Caden coming in asking me what was wrong… and then me going into Caden's room to sleep in the same bed with him.

That last part I didn't understand. I must've been half asleep when I did that. If I had any common sense at all, I would've stayed as far away from Caden as possible because I was afraid I would admit something by actions.

I needed to sit down. I just couldn't figure out why on earth I would crawl into Caden's bed. Sure, it was almost a dream come true… to be sleeping right next to the one you love. But there could be severe consequences to that. I could lose him forever.

Then something hit me. Hard. I whirled around, finding a pillow on the ground.

"Why the fuck are you up so early? It's Saturday," Caden said as he stared at with his hazel brown eyes that I always wanted to drown in.

I looked at the clock, seeing it was only 7 AM. It was the time I always woke up at. I just shrugged, turning to head out the door. I needed a cold shower. I still felt gross from last night.

On my way to the door, however, I was stopped by a hand wrapped around my wrist, tugging me back onto the bed.

"Wait. Don't go yet." Caden put his arms around me, resting his head on my back as he yawned. "I want to hear about this dream you had last night."

Shit. Caden. Don't touch me like that. "It was nothing really." I started to push him off of me. "Just go back to sleep. I'm going to go take a shower."

But he wouldn't let go of me. Instead, his grip grew tighter around my shoulders. "I can't sleep after someone's woken me up. Now, tell me about this dream. I really want to know."

No. You really don't. Now just leave the fuck alone. Those words almost came out of my mouth… but I stopped myself. I didn't want to make him worry about me.

"I'll tell you about it later." As soon as I said that, I loosened his grip and headed to take a cold shower. I needed one.


The cold shower calmed me down a bit. When I got out and went back to my brother's room to check up on him, he had already fallen back asleep. I walked downstairs to my room and got dressed quickly.

I glanced at the clock by the time I was finished. It was an hour later, making me blink. Showers were usually about five minutes for me since I hated taking them. But this one… had to have lasted longer. I must've really lost track of time somewhere in there. Maybe I was too busy thinking about what I would tell Caden about my dream.

So maybe I could fake sick? I sat down on my bed, contemplating it. Usually my mom gets worried shitless when I get sick… same with my brother. And they practically forget everything they wanted to ask. I think.

I lied back down on my bed, pulling my covers over me as I turned to face the window. It looked hot outside, just like it was in my dream, which made me sick to my stomach. I didn't want to think about that dream, but it just kept on coming up.

Why my brother wanted to know about it so bad was beyond me. He never asked me about my nightmares, making me feel as if he didn't care too much about me, even though I could consider that being true now because he might've seen my journal.

I pulled my covers over me more, clutching the sides of my head in frustration. My teeth were grinding against one another. I wished I died instead of lived. I should've died if it wasn't for those stupid, well-trained doctors. My mother was never made to hold two babies. That's why one had to have problems. And that one just happened to be me. Maybe me loving Caden was apart of my birth defect… that I'd have some sick mind like I do now.

My thoughts stopped instantly as someone opened the door. I turned around so my back would face the wall and I could look at the one who entered my room without knocking. It was Caden, standing at the doorway, rubbing his eye.

"Why the hell are you in bed again? You seemed so lively this morning. Anyway, the mother told me to tell you breakfast is ready."

I took a deep breath, forcing myself to lie. "I'm not hungry right now. I just don't feel good."

Caden stared at me, seeming to disbelieve that I was actually sick. I cursed myself, knowing I shouldn't've lied… because I was never good at it.

He turned around and shook his head. "Mother! Eli claims to be sick again."

Within seconds, mom came in running. She walked over to my bed and placed a hand over my forehead. "Caden, go get the thermometer." That said, Caden ran away to grab it. She looked at me and shook her head, the exact same way Caden did. She brushed some hair away from my forehead.

Caden came back with the thermometer my mother had asked for. She handed it to me and I stuck it under my tongue. I knew I wouldn't have a fever… but it didn't mean they wouldn't believe me. Last time, right before I got sick with pneumonia, I didn't have a fever. I just felt like crap.

When the thermometer beeped, my mom took it out and looked at it. "Well… you have no temperature. But I'm taking no chances. You stay here. I'm going to call Julian."

Oh god. Of course she had to call Julian. He was my doctor, my tutor, my baby-sitter… practically everything. He's the only one my mom and dad can rely on. He's cheap and well-trained to be everything someone like me needed. I did like him, don't get me wrong, but he creeped me out sometimes. He just had this weird, eerie way of "checking" up on me.

"Julian?" Caden made a face. He didn't like Julian much. "He's a pervert."

"Caden, that's rude. Why don't you tell him that to his face?"

"Really Mother!? Can I!?" His face drastically changed into a grin.

Mom shook her head, realizing her mistake. Caden would do it if she permitted it… even if it was sarcasm. Caden never picked up on it. "No. Then we'll lose him for good and we need him. Now lets leave Eli alone." She walked towards the door, pushing Caden out of it. She smiled back at me and shut the door.

I stared at the door for a while then turned to face the wall again, finding myself falling asleep.


When Julian arrived, Mom woke me up by knocking on the door.

"Julian is here. Can he come in?"

I moaned. "No. I'm busy inflaming my penis." I got that one from Caden. But when I realized what I said, my eyes widened. How sick is that to tell your mom? "I'm just kidding."

Caden burst out laughing at that comment. I heard my mom clear her throat. "What have you done with my son, Caden?" She opened the door, Julian standing next to her. Caden was behind my mom, still laughing and shrugging a bit. He winked at me and left to go upstairs.

I sat up, staring at the cocky grin on Julian's face which easily sent chills down my spine. His gray, light-blue eyes were staring at me through glasses he hardly ever wore. His straight, light blonde hair had grown longer since the last time I saw it. It could've easily been put back in a pony-tail. He was tall, and his upper-body was adorned with a black shirt, his lower-half wearing very tight blue jeans. It kind of looked like he got back from a club considering he never wore clothes that weren't professional around my mom.

But she didn't seem to notice. Either that, she wasn't paying too much attention.

"He's been complaining of illness, but he doesn't have a fever. I don't want to take any chances." She stared at me. "And also, I think he's having some trouble with his History. Could you help him a bit?" She smiled. "I'll pay you extra."

"Don't worry 'bout it, Mrs. Jameson. You don't need to pay me extra. I like spending time with your son. He's quite the interesting person and fun to hang around with." He winked at me, his grin faded slightly. I shuddered. That wink was way more playful than Caden's.

"Thanks Julian. It's a pleasure to hear that. Way more pleasurable than Elizer's last quote." She turned to me and shook her head, mouthing the words 'We'll talk later.' "Well, I'm going to go make cookies… since it's the only thing I'm good for right now. I'll leave you two alone. Please give a good check-up because I don't want results coming out like last time. That pneumonia almost killed him."

Julian nodded and waved her out of the door. "It's alright, Mrs. Jameson. I will be sure to check up on him carefully."

She nodded and sighed, walking out the door and shut it behind her.

Julian looked back at me, a pleased look on his face. He walked over to my bed and sat down at the edge, his tight pants looking like they were about to break.

"Interested in my pants, Elizer? Because that's all you seem to look at today. Or is it something else?"

I looked up at him sharply and snarled. That was uncalled for. "No. They're just something you rarely wear…" I murmured, starting to feel uncomfortable under his piercing gaze.

Julian laughed at this. "Oh, so you actually pay attention to what I wear? That's cute."

I blinked. Okay… for some reason, I felt like he was drunk because this usually wasn't how Julian acted. Usually he was nice. He checked up on me and did whatever he needed to do and left.

I made a face, letting him know how I was feeling about all this. But he wasn't exactly staring at my face. He was staring at my chest. I looked down to see if something was on my shirt or something.

After a second of looking, and finding nothing, I looked up. "So can we get this over with sometime soon?"

He looked up at my face. "What's the hurry? We have all day."

I looked at the time, noting that it was 11 AM. I shrugged. "I don't know. I just want to do stuff."

"So what… are you telling me you're feeling better now, Eli?" He asked.

I shrugged. "I guess."

Julian looked at me, a smirk on his face. "Are you meaning to tell me that you acted sick so your mom would call me over? Do you like me that much?"

I slid under my covers again, resting my head on the pillow. I didn't want to tell him I hated him… but I was beginning to have this feeling that he meant more than a friend. And it definitely wasn't the case… no matter how much I wished it was. Because if I liked him it would be better than liking my brother the way I do.

"No answer?" He chuckled and moved off the bed, walking over to my nightstand. He reached into his back pocket, pulling out a folded piece of paper. He handed it to me.

"I drew something for you. Don't ask why… I just wanted to express my feelings in a different way," He sounded kind of sarcastic at that comment.

I willingly took it from under the covers and unfolded it. Much to my dismay, I yelped, which would've been a scream if his hand hadn't fallen over my mouth. He was kneeling beside my bed now.

"Shh… there's nothing to be afraid of," he soothed. "I just wanted to ask if you recognized it."

I nodded, feeling my hands beginning to tremble. The picture I was holding was none other than the same butterfly I found in my journal.

"Now don't scream for help… or I'll tell them everything."

I nodded and he allowed me to talk again by removing his hand. "H-how did you find my journal? I thought I hid it so well." My breathing was beginning to increase.

"Under the bed? Some place to hide it… considering we're always on the floor when studying." He grinned, his face getting closer to mine. His hand was against my forehead, moving the bangs from it as he slid his hand back over and over again in a coaxing way. It felt good, but at the same time felt terribly wrong. "Even though it's not everyday you find someone in love with your brother. And personally, I'm not one that accepts it much. But… you. You're just so adorable that I feel I can use this opportunity to get a little... hm… well, closer to you." And with that, his mouth closed over mine.

And the only thing I thought about was the dangers he as risking. What if my mom found out? What if she walked in right this instant?

I never even thought that pushing him off of me would've been a smart thing to do… since he wanted to get a little further with this.


A/N: XD This chapter took a while. x And I'm sorry I reposted it. I just thought Julian was too evil in the first one I posted and I didn't want that. I want him to be more of a... erm... seductive character? XD Yay. Well, please review. And thanks for the reviews so far. D They're awesome.