CHAPTER 1

Like usual, it was the start of a new weekend, a Friday night, and I had absolutely nothing to do except watch Nicholas Sparks movies with my best friend/roommate. She had put in A Walk to Remember even though I complained and whined about it for a good half-hour.

I HATED Nicholas Sparks books but she was so heart-broken I had to give in. It wasn't that he wasn't a great writer but he puts his talent to waste by writing absolute crap and the worst kind too—the sappy, unromantic, unrealistic, makes me want to puke crap. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bitter about love or anything. I like to call it being realistic because in real life, love doesn't work that way.

I silently thanked the lord as the film finally came to an end and the credits started to roll. I shifted to sitting position and turned to look at Carmen, my usually hyper, looks-like-she's-a-Prozac-lover friend.

Poor kid.

She was practically bawling her eyes out and blowing her nose profusely, adding to the pile of tissues that was soon to fill up our entire apartment. She had been crying all day, partly due to these sappy crap movies and partly due to the fact that her loser boyfriend cheated on her.

I warned her about him so many times but she just refused to listen me, claiming he was a 'sweet caring guy' who would never to do that to her and that she loved him and trusted him and they would always be together forever. Of course, I really had to restrain myself from saying, "I told you so" although I really wanted to. Like I said, love just doesn't work that way.

"Oh Brooke." She said between sobs as she blew her nose into the tissue, which let me tell you is very unattractive. "Why are men such dogs? I hate them all. I mean, I might as well date girls."

Frowning, I scooted myself away from her. Let's just all hope she was kidding. "First of all, you aren't even attracted to girls. Second of all, Jason was a scuzzy scumbag. Third of all, Carmen, you deserve so much better so you should take this as a blessing." I tried to comfort her, popping a cracker into my mouth.

"A-A blessing?" She asked eagerly. "Like the gods are just testing me to see if I could handle this? Like they're going to send me someone better in the future?"

Oh goodness, I wanted to smack her into reality. What a twit. "Yes. The love god, Aphrodite, was just testing you. You know, handle the heartache, get a new man." I commented sarcastically. "Come on, get real. We all go through this because let's face it, men are just pigs. Foul, perverted, lying cheating pigs"

"Nuh uh." The flaming redhead protested. "You haven't."

"Yes I have." I argued immediately as my hazel eyes darted to the ground and I thought about my previous relationships.

"Name one." She demanded.

Hmm…as much as I hated to admit it, she was right. I haven't been in one serious relationship since I've moved here from my small town in New Mexico. I think I've been on a few dates but nothing major. I opened my mouth to answer when suddenly our gay roommate, Ross, came waltzing in with a huge grin on his face.

"Darlings." He sighed, flopping down right between us. "I think I'm in love."

I rolled my eyes as Carmen started her blubbering fest once again. "Who is it this time?" I asked. "Scott? Phil? Jonathan? I swear, you are such a man whore."

After he finished patting Carmen's back, he turned to face me and narrowed his eyes. "Excuse me, Miss Unlucky in love. Aren't we a little bitter today? And I'll have you know it's none of them. It's…." He sighed dreamily. "Jeremy. He's definitely the 'one.'"

"Wait." I said, confused. "Isn't he Zach's friend? He's gay? I didn't know that. Besides, if he's Zach's friend, then you definitely shouldn't be dating him."

"Well, technically…" Ross admitted as he ran his fingers through perfectly highlighted strawberry blonde hair. "He's not…yet but once he gets a load of me, he will be. God, he's hot. And what is exactly wrong with Zachary?"

A lot, I thought angrily. That man was the bane of my existence, the pain in my ass, the thorn in my side and you know what's the worse part about it? He's my co-worker. Mind you, I didn't start this feud. He did. Ever since the first day I was hired as a network engineer at Symantec, he's been giving me such a hard time and all because I pointed out one little error he made. How was I supposed to know it was against the men's code of honor to be corrected by a woman?

Obviously to err was human but to forgive was against company policy.

"God Ross." I drawled out, sickened by his liking for Zachary Stanwood. "You like everyone who's a dick."

He gasped. "I do not! I like everyone with a –"

"Alright. I got the picture. You're gross." I interrupted, placing a hand over his mouth while Carmen giggled.

"And honey, you're jealous. You know Brooke, you don't have to be. If you would just loosen up a little bit, you would get a man, too." He replied with a smug grin after he took my hand off his mouth.

"He's right. You're a little…dare I say it? Uptight." Carmen butted in, poking her head out from behind Ross' back.

I furrowed my eyebrows at the two-against one defense we had going on. Why did the subject always turn to my love life or lack thereof? "Ross, you don't have a man and Carmen, don't encourage him. I am not uptight! I'm loose as can be. Loosey-goosey, baby."

They both raised an eyebrow and glared at me with disbelief. "You are so sad." Ross said, shaking his head. Carmen nodded her head to agree. "I was just kidding but maybe you do need a man. I mean you're wound up so tight you can't even eat junk food without freaking out because it contains 'too much calories.' Look at you now."

I looked up once I finished biting into my apple. "An apple a day keeps the doctor away?"

"But if he's got cute, forget the fruit." Ross finished while Carmen laughed, giving him a high five.

"Lovely, Ross." I replied sarcastically. "Listen guys, don't worry about it, I have one."

Both Carmen and Ross gasped loudly, leaning back. "You do?" They both asked at once.

No, but if it'll get them to shut up, then sure. Why not? Actually, I would have one by now if a certain Mr. Stanwood didn't get in my fucking way. I frowned at the recent, embarrassing memory from last week.

"Whoa, look at that intense look on her face, Ross. Do you think she's constipated?" Carmen asked, snapping me back from my flashback. I shook my head and blinked, seeing my two roommates gawking at me like I was some sort of freak on display. What was I? A man-eating chicken?

"Shut up." I retorted, standing up to go to the bathroom and wash my face.

"What were you thinking of? You looked really mad not to mention scary." Ross commented as he made himself more comfortable on the couch. "You were so out it, you didn't even notice us poking you."

I subconsciously wrapped my arms around myself and turned around. "You poked me?"

"Yea. Damn girl. I don't think you have an ounce of fat on you. You should stop with the health thing and eat something good. In case you haven't noticed, guys like a little junk in the trunk nowadays. You know, advice for your new boyfriend". Carmen responded, winking at me.

Oh right, my imaginary boyfriend. I'm going to start eating oily fatty potato chips for Casper.

Ignorant fools.

I rolled my eyes; I think I liked it better when she was crying. "You're one to talk, you're like a stick, Carmen!"

"A squishy stick." She replied smugly. "They like something to hold on. So tell us about him."

I stared at her. How on earth did she go from annoying and heart-broken to prying and nosy? I swear she's schitzo. "He's someone you will never meet."

Because I've never even met him.

Christ, my life is messed up.