A growing fear emerges
My eyes staring out the window
Into the clear, empty skies
Staring out into the stars
That lie so far away from this dismal place
Oh, how I envy them!
To be unaware of the pain and misery
And to be unaffected by cruelty and tyranny
The car stops
I get out
And walk into the darkness of my home
With tears on the verge of birth.
I sit on my bed
And cry, cry and cry
Only to realize that it is useless
She will never love me
She will never care
Like the stars, she lies far from me
But I do not envy her.
You have destroyed my last remaining happiness
When you gave back what I gave with love
Don't you love your daughter anymore?
No, I am not your daughter
Like I once was
I have morphed into something else
Right in front of your eyes, haven't I?
A failure to you, an anger that is the only thing left
But oh mother,
Did you see me sit and cry in my room?
And did you see me shake my head with sadness?
Did you see me hurt myself,
Because of the pain you have willingly brought me?
Like the stars, you will linger on
Here, within the deepest realms of my heart.
But unlike the beautiful stars that bring me peace,
You will never truly be with me.
I am sad to say that your womb—
The one you greatly cherished—
Has ended up betraying you.
It has brought you an enemy,
Disguised as a loving daughter.
Oh mother, dear mother,
It doesn't hurt to say you hate me, now does it?
Because if it did, then it is not true.
So I now thank you for your hatred, my dear mother,
Because you have made it easier for me,
To hate you.