I want to know-

Yet I do not.

This horrible clinging

To something

I fear is not real.

A fragment,

a shard,

a sliver

is all that is left

Of that which I


Have come to despise.

It sickens me-

This unknowing.

It sickens me-

This hope.

I want it to be over.

I hope this will soon be over.

I swear I shall destroy it myself!

This wretched, wretched