In Case of Emergency
Kat's Point of View
No matter how much time passed that kiss lingered in my mouth. I could taste it when I swallowed, no matter if I was eating, drinking or just breathing. I thrived on that taste, all the while enjoying that taste, not alcohol, not drugs and not even getting to see him. Instead when I got that biting urge to find something to give me instant gratification I swallowed hard and breathed in deeply. He would be here, in my house in only a few short days and I could barely concentrate because of it. I'd cleaned everything up three times in the past four days, had changed the dish to serve for dinner and had changed the CD she was listening to ten times in the past hour. Excitement and even a tiny bit of fear bubbled inside of me and I could barely contain it. Once more I squirmed on my couch while Bloc Party blasted, my singing getting louder and louder.
Bam's Point of View
I closed my eyes and tried hard to picture Kat's face, which was harder than I thought. It felt like I hadn't seen her in years. Next time I see her I'm going to have to study her face better so that when I'm not with her I can actually picture her. I laughed as I pretended to pay attention to my second to last group therapy session. In some strange way I knew that I had grown to depend on these sessions and I would miss them when I was gone. Not that I was going to pay attention to another one of my companions talking about their drug addictions.
When our group therapy was over I headed back towards my room, formally our room. It felt empty since Kat had left, as if someone had ripped out half of my heart. A more appropriate feeling was how I felt when I first got here, like losing drugs was losing my entire identity. Now Kat being gone made me feel that way, I knew that I needed to find my own identity and maybe that meant living alone, but I knew that I couldn't escape other people and that I had to gain my own identity while also maintaining the love I'd found.
Though saying that half of my heart was gone was an exaggeration because moments after I entered the room Ryan, my new roommate jumped on my back, whooping as he did so. I wasn't alone per say, but Ryan wasn't Kat, I just couldn't pretend that male company was the same. Without trying I could remember the day I'd first met Kat, the horrible withdrawals and the tears, the fact I held such hatred for Purple Heart and Kat from the second I got in there. Upon remembering that day I realized that Kat had been a lot nicer to me than I had deserved. Now, after so much time and therapy had passed I was so appreciative that I'd ended up in this place. I had needed help and I was far from cured, but at least now I can make a long trip towards full recovery, not that I'd ever be able to escape my identity as a drug abuser. It'd be part of my life for as long as I lived, but it would be a constant reminder of the fact I'd found someone who could love me even at my worst.
Bright sunshine attacked me as I stepped outside into the warm air. I shielded my eyes by pushing my Electric sunglasses from their perch on my head to their rightful resting place on the bridge of my nose. After a few moments of my settling myself on the lip of the fountain that greeted those coming to Purple Heart Rehabilitation, I saw a familiar black Mercedes pull up and screech to a halt in front of me. Two familiar men my age, give or take a few years, were in plain view of me now. One with black hair down to his shoulders, a seductive smile playing his lips and the palest skin I'd ever seen. The other with long strawberry blonde hair masking his babyish face, big dark sunglasses covering most of his face and the only thing not obscured by his sunglasses or hair was his scraggily beard that gently tickled his neck. The second I saw them I knew I wouldn't end up at Kat's house tonight, or perhaps even the next night. My grip on my cell phone tightened as I tried to unscramble the possible words I'd have to send Kat. I wanted to see her so bad I could smell her, taste her even, but I also wanted to see my guy friends and since they were the ones who were here picking me up, I couldn't just ask to get dropped off at Kat's now could I?
Kat's Point of View
When I'm nervous I sit on my kitchen counter with a cup of coffee and slowly nurse it, breathing in the hazelnut aroma was the most satisfying thing to soothe my anxiety. Today I found myself in my skinniest jeans, a slim fitting black hoodie and no shirt underneath, doing just that. I was waiting, waiting for my life to start I could say, but I was in actuality for Bam to get to my house where he was supposed to be moving into. But it'd been 3 hours since he was supposed to arrive and I wasn't the type to wait by the door, so I was willing myself not to call him and desperately hoping he was alright. I'd never really been in a situation before where I was waiting for someone because I absolutely hate waiting. People who are late do not deserve your respect, which is why right now I had half a mind to shove Bam right back out the door into the street when he showed up, that is if he ever showed up. I shifted my weight so that my legs were crossed and sighed, this was going to be a long night. Just me and New Found Glory serenading me, helping me pretend that the world was fair, that Bam loved me and that he was thinking about me right now. As I closed my eyes to calm down my phone trilled, Hey There Delilah lightly played and I looked over at it, checking to see who was texting me. There it was, exactly what I feared, Bam wasn't coming tonight and I had no intentions of letting him in after tonight.
Kat, it's Bam I'm so sorry but my friends and I are at the beach surfing and I want to see you so bad, but they drove me and I can't ditch them. I'm so sorry I love you. Please forgive me.
I flipped the screen of my sidekick back closed and exited out of the text. I should've known you don't meet people in Rehab centers.
Francis pulled me down the street, her leash tugging at my hand, so that I had to speed up my jogging pace to a full out run. I'd adopted Francis a month after getting out of rehab, she was a wonderful little Bulldog who loved me more than any man I had ever met. My Saucony's bounced off the pavement again as I turned the corner, running headlong into a man with black hair who before I ran into him was talking into a blackberry at a very high decibel. The man I'd knocked over was none other than the man who'd made me decide to get Francis because I'd been left as lonely as ever. There he was in the flesh, Bam, and I didn't know what to do. Apparently he didn't either because he just stared at me making weird noises that sounded like a cavemen grunting.
"Hi Bam." He hadn't lost his balance for more than a second apparently because he wasn't sitting on the ground, he was standing up looking at me.
"Hey, uh how have you been doing?"
"I'm fine. This is Francis, Francis this is Bam, I met him in Rehabilitation." I kneeled down and rubbed behind Francis' ears, looking up at Bam as I did so.
"Hi Francis?" Francis didn't seem too keen on the idea of Bam because she gave him what appeared to be a scowl, but on a bulldog you can never be so sure of such things.
"Francis doesn't like you, just like I don't like you. I'll be going now, have a nice day." I turned back in the direction I'd come from, but as I walked, I could hear his footsteps behind me.
"Come on, don't leave like this. I tried calling you, I tried emailing you and texting you and you were the one who didn't talk to me. You let me go. Why can't we be friends?" I spun on my heels, my nose just grazing his as I did so.
"I can't be friends with people who say they'll live with me and just never show up." He certainly was a pest, I continued to jog down the street with Francis, who wasn't running as fast as before, and he followed along side of me.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to happen. I feel horrible about it and I miss you so much it burns."
"You should've thought of that before you did that to me, now shouldn't you have?" This was getting ridiculous; he was running with me and didn't seem phased at all by his actions. Why couldn't he just leave me alone, what did he want me to do, forgive him right here on the spot.
"Let me take you to dinner, anything, just let me show you I'm sorry."
"My place, I'll email you directions, 9 pm tonight. Goodbye Bam." Since he'd gotten what he wanted he fell back and I went back to my jog in peace. Only it wasn't as peaceful as before because now my hands were shaking and I felt anxiety well up inside of me.
(Author Note: Sorry for the delay, I am working on this story again now that I've taken some time off and gotten over my writers block. This chapter is dedicated to Ryan Holt. R.I.P. I'd like to thank my boss Mary for getting me back into writing and reminding me to not give up on my talents.)