Memory In paper

It was a memory in paper and hanging on her wall

Another memory on the back in his untidy scrawl

On the front, good times and good people, wearing uncomfortable shoes

On the back, you're all I hope for, and I'll always love you

She was used to letting go of memories and the past

But that particular one, she had wanted to last

She liked to stop and stare and remember back when

She liked how it was captured in this glossy eight by ten

It was when times were better and she could almost forget

That she'd asked him to leave and he'd actually left

She never wanted to be with him, she kept her feelings covered

But he figured her out, convinced her that they'd be happy as lovers

He wouldn't say he loved her, but didn't deny it was the truth

She ignored it because she was already seduced.

She fell hard for him and suddenly it was beyond of her control

He was so handsome and smart, wanted to write his words on her soul.

She hated him because she'd never asked him for this

She grew to resent him and laced sweetness and spite in each kiss

Life was supposed to be black and white and this was never her plan

She knew who she was; she never expected she'd fall in love with a man

They bickered and argued convincing lies into truth

She blamed it on arrogance but he called it youth

He believed he loved her and wanted to convince her to try

She was done with him and was convinced her love was a lie

She'd never loved him, she said, and if even she did, what did that matter?

She'd tricked herself and now the dream was broken up and shattered.

She tried to figure out how to cut out completely such a persistent man

But they were both surprised that when she released him, he ran.

Gone were times of love and hope and promising things

No more future, talks of children, hopes of golden wedding rings

They had been such good lovers, but were no longer friends

It bewildered them both how quickly forever could end

When it had failed, she felt young, and he felt tired and old.

She remembered passionate love and regretted she'd turned cold.

She wished their lives hadn't had to turn out this way

But it had been their own choices, and really, he was okay.

They'd really been in love, it was something they both knew,

But she'd never be okay with it, so what can you do?

Try to say good-bye over coffee? Light a candle, say a prayer?

What can you can do when you know you'll always care?

He got a dog, she got a new lover, she drank more coffee, he had less sex

But they were just more hollow efforts, worthless parlor tricks.

The fact of the matter was their love was something they'd never forget

But there were enough mistakes that it was something they both would regret

There was nothing they could do to just pick and move on

But weeks turned to months and he stayed away, she was gone

So instead she bought a frame for her perfect eight by ten

So she'd never forget what it was really like back then

The picture on the front was sweet and serene

But the memory on the back was the one to be seen

She had resented him for his love and his arrogance too

For how well he exposed her and how he always just knew

He'd never let her have secrets, always thought he knew the truth

But he was wrong sometimes, and he'd been the one who was seduced

He really hadn't known all her secrets then, there'd been one she could keep

He had cared for her deeply, but she was the one whose love was too deep