chapter 3

Friday was brushing her hair an looking out of the window at the Mason's house. The top bedroom's light was on, no doubt that was Jay's room now.

"I wonder if he likes me" she thought to herself putting on her earings, plain white gold studs, a brithday present. This wasn't Friday, she never cared if a guy liked her or not. She tied her hair back and grabbed her jacket, it was already dark and she should have headed over to Francis' by now. Friday ran down the stairs and took her keys from the hook next to the door.

"MUM! DAD! I'M LEAVING!" she yelled into the silent house. There was no reply. Friday shrugged, flung open the door and nearly colided with Jay.

"oh, hey" Jay said nervously. He was twirling a rose in his fingers. Friday looked at him curiously. "This is for you..." He said and handed her the pretty red flower.

"Wow, a rose, my favorite" Friday laughed and blushed.

"My Grandad's growing some in his garden... I just thought you might like one" Jay smiled. Nobody had ever given Friday a rose before and she was a bit shocked.

"I'm just going over to my friends house... want to walk with me?" she asked locking her front door. Jay nodded and they began to make there way down the street.

"so your about eighteen, right?" Friday asked as they pased through the silent, empty park.

"No way, I just turned sixteen" Jay laughed.

"You look alot older" she smiled.

"Do I?" He asked. Friday nodded and he laughed again. What was so funny? Suddenly an owl hooted loudly behind Friday and she jumped, grabbing Jay's arm. What the hell was wrong with her? She was never afraid of the dark! She blushed when she realised what she did but Jay just put his arm around her shoulder.

"How sweet..." she thought, smiling inwardly.

"I'm surprised I haven't met you before I moved here, I visit every month" Jay said as they passed the locked up clothes shops down the high street.

"I dont really go out alot" Friday mumbled. "I like to keep to myself... I dont really fit in here" Jay looked at her.

"That I can't understand, your a beautiful, kind girl who likes to be different" He said nudging her. Friday blushed again.

"well.. that's just it. I like to be different... that's whats so unacceptable" She replied nudging him back.

"I think I see" Jay said staring at the floor. There was silence for a few minutes before they got to the top of Francis' road.

"I'm ok now" Friday said as they came to a halt. Jay smiled at her and walked away. For a second he stopped, turned around and blew her a kiss. Then Friday knew, she knew why she had to cut herself. Here was someone different to the rest, someone willing to accept her and her dissruptive behavior. Someone who would care.

"Its not real..." She whispered to herself as she walked down to Francis' house. That was why she had to cut herself, because blood was real and nothing else was.

Friday flipped the channels on Francis' TV not bothering to check if what was actually on.

"your going to melt the romote if you do it that fast" Francis said putting the bowl of sugar popcorn infront of her. Friday stopped to grab a handful of popcorn.

"what movie are we watching?" She asked turning off the TV.

"oh... I forgot to rent one" He said lazily. This anoyed Friday.

"come one Fran, its your week and you never forget" she scowled.

"well I'm sorry my social life is important to me. I had a date with Marcelle, I was meant to get one but I forgot" Francis rebutted. Friday rolled her eyes.

"oh! I should have know, Marcelle reers her ugly head in the conversation once again. Of course this is something to do with her" She said sitting up.

"Your just jealous, Friday, because I have a life and you don't!" Francis half shouted standing up.

"I don't have a life?" Friday said in mock surprise "Tell me then, what's better about yours?"

"I have a life! unlike you!" Francis was yelling now. "Because nobody will hang out with a fat, goth freak with no friends!" Friday stared at him, the tears pricking her eyes. How could a friend say something so cruel?

"Is that what you think?" she asked choking back a sob. Francis was so angry he didn't notice she was nearly crying.

"Yes that's what I think" He growled. Friday picked up her bag and jacket.

"Then I won't waste anymore of your time" She said quietly and ran from the room.

Outside Francis' house Friday had to fight to regain herself. This was just something else she had managed to fck up. Another mistake she had made, just another pill to take. But this time Friday could'nt swallow. She ran through the streets, almost knocking people over, depserate to get back to her room.Her quiet room, where she could think. Did she want to think? Did she want to think about all the sht she created? She didn't know. Friday sprinted down the high street and into her road. She didn't stop to look at anything or anyone, she just wanted to get as far away from Francis' house as she could. Finally she got to her house; and panting, she unlocked the front door and ran upstairs. Friday flung herself onto her bed and let the tears come, her sobs muffed under her pillow. Friday cried until all her tears were gone and all that was left was the memories of what had happened. Slowly she sat up and dried her eyes with her t-shirt.

"fat..." she whispered to herself. Was she fat? Friday undressed slowly and stood in front of the full length mirror. The other, red faced Friday stared back at her. Francis was right. Fat.

"your so fat!" she hissed at herself in the mirror. She could'nt stand it now that she knew. Fat. Friday raised her fist slowly and brought it down on her stomach. Fat. She hit herself again, and again. Fat. Her stomach was throbbing painfully but Friday didn't stop, she just kept hitting and hitting. Fat. She ran to bathroom and grabbed her razor. Fat. She pressed the blade down on her stomach and drew it across the soft flesh. The blood that she saw made her want to do it again, and she did, but deeper. Friday lay on the floor which was now smeared with blood. "I'm so fat" She thought to herself in the dim light of her bathroom. She was done with herself now. She was fat.

At eleven thirty in the morning, Friday's alarm clock went off. She sat up bleary eyed, grabbed the alarm and threw it at the wall.

"MA! you turned my alarm on??" She shouted down the stairs to her mother.

"I need you to come to the shops with me, we have to buy your cousin a birthday present, honey!" Davida yelled back. Friday gave an anoyed growl and fell back onto her pillow.

"Ma, its Saturday morning, please PLEASE can you leave me alone for another hour?" She shouted, her voice muffled from the pillow that she had burried her face in.

"Friday, you get up now like your mother said" Her Dad said from a faraway place. Friday ignored him. Sam banged loudly on the door.

"dont make me come in there!" He shouted. Friday shut her eyes for a second more and then opened them.

"FINE! you evil people! I'm up! I'm up!" She growled, got out of bed and looked in the mirror. Yesterdays gothic makeup was smudged all over her face. It was Saturday. Oh sht it was Saturday. Her mother would torture her all day with pretty pink dresses and high heels. Friday trudged into her bathroom and washed her face.

"I'm leaving in ten seconds!" Her mother called up the stairs.

"I'm COMMING!" Friday shouted back, pulling on her jeans and a black long sleeved T-shirt. She avoided looking at the bandages on her wrists, knowing it would only make her want to do it again and that was the last thing she needed right now. As Friday was lacing up her black army boots her phone rang, it was Francis. She ignored it.

"somehow I'm not in the mood for self obsessed brainiacs" she muttered to herself and walked grudgingly down the stairs.

"well its about time, what were you doing up there?!" Davida asked flustering over her makeup in the hall mirror.

"attempting suicide" Friday replied putting on her sunglasses. She didn't like people looking her in the eye in public, it made her nervous.

"well do you think you could have done it a bit faster" Her mother said not listening. Friday scowled at her but she didn't notice. She never noticed anything about Friday. When Friday had come home with her lip piercing her mother only realised she'd had it done a week later. Davida grabbed the car keys off the hook and marched her daughter outside to their Mercades, her Dad's pride and joy. Friday got in and slammed the door, then reached forward to get her I-Pod out of the glove compartment. Her mother was talking to her about something, but she didn't hear, she already had the music on top volume, and thats where it would stay for the rest of the day.

"Friday!" Davida shouted across the shop. Friday could'nt hear her because she was listening to rock music at top volume.

"...It's something unpredictable but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life..." she sung along to herself unaware of the strange looks she was getting from the other customers. Suddenly the music stopped. Her mother had turned her I-Pod off.

"MA!" Friday yelled outraged "I was listening to that!" Davida put the I-pod in her brown leather handbag.

"And now your listening to me. come here" she said sternly. Friday scowled.