Note from Chobi: Just as a head's up this story is girlXgirl......as in shojo-ai......ok if you don't get it by now it's lesbian. So if you don't like that, then don't read it. This is my first yuri story so reviews would be nice. It's told through the veiw point of Kayori Watanabe and is dead-on. Enjoy
There were only 2 things I've wanted from people in life: trust and love. I have received nothing; so now I've given up. There's just no point anymore. All of my 'friends' that I've had left me in one way or another. I literally had a 2 second boyfriend but that relationship crashed and burned into hell. Then there are my parents. What can I say about them? 5 words: They don't give a damn. I've given up on love....given up on people....given up on everything. I am loveless. The only passion I hold is for music. My band-mates are my only friends. That's probably the only reason I go to school.
The year is going by pretty fast; it's only November but the others months felt like nothing. Soon it'll be Christmas, then Easter, and finally summer again. Before you know it I'll be a junior, 16, and 1 step closer to getting a car.
I slam my backpack down on the school-tiled floor as I get down on my knees to open my locker. The only pictures inside are of music artists, such as Puffy Ami Yumi, Nanase Aikawa, and my role model: Utada Hikaru. I also have pictures of American bands: Evanescence, Blink 182, Breaking Benjamin, and so many others. I smile on the inside as I glance at the singers before me. I only hope I can share the spotlight with them one day.
I close my locker and quickly gaze at the passer-bys in the hall, trying to dodge one, and only one, particular person. They're out of my vision and I turn, heading towards the cafeteria. 'Please don't be here. Please don't be here. Please don't be here.' I repeat over and over in my head. My heart pounds with slight fright and anticipation.
To late. A tingle travels up my spine. I try to sink down as the girl's high-pitched voice rings in my ears. Her footsteps suddenly seem so loud. I feel like an evil presence is over me, and everyone is staring at me , but they're not. They''re talking to each other, absorbed in their own lives, and the presence around me is just annoying, not evil.
"I've been looking all over for you Miss Kayori!" The girl exclaims as she catches up and starts walking right next to me.
I sigh. "Good morning Michi-chan." I say boringly without meaning it.
Michiyu Tetsuki, or Michi as I like to call her, is a freshman at my school, and has been stalking me ever since day 1 of my sophomore year. She claims to be my 'number 1' fan , hence following me all over the place. I still can't figure out what she admires.
"Wow Kayori-san you look ravenous this morning!" Michi exclaims looking up at me. I roll my eyes. She's such a suck-up.
"What do you want Michi?" I ask, getting irritated. I'm not in the mood for her today....well, I'm never in the mood for Michi, but you get the idea. I glance down the hall, at the cafeteria entryway. "Look I gotta go. " I blurt out quickly and abruptly as I race down the hall.
"Kay, see you later!" I hear her call as I run farther and farther away. Soon it all disappears. Everyone's voices, even their existence, it all goes away.
The next thing I know a loud ringing echoes in my ears. Chairs screech as my classmates push themselves out of their seats. It's still dark to me. I don't want to open my eyes nor get up; finally someone pokes me.
"Kayori?" It is the voice of my Chemistry teacher, Mr. Riogame. The whole day is a blur to me; it is the end of my last class."Class is over." He continues.
Duh, I think I know that.
I moan silently as I lift my head up. The sunlight is so bright. "Sorry." I mutter as I begin to gather my books.
"It's alright." He says with a chuckle, then suddenly turns serious"Miss Watanabe is everything ok at home?" Concern fills his chocolate brown eyes.
I think; it's never been alright, and it'll probably never be alright .I lie, not wanting to worry him. "Yes." I say. "Everything's alright." What's to tell anyway? My dad is a jerk-off, perverted basterd who abuses me and my mom is an alcoholic; a run down mess who'd rather have a drink then protect her own child. In any case both of my parent's are dead to me. "Everything's fine." I repeat as I put my books in a neat pile."I'm just tired....." I admit with a yawn. "..that's all."
"You should get some sleep." Mr. Riogame says with a smile.
I glance at my watch. "I'd love to-" I lie again. I've got all the sleep I'll need in Chemistry."but I have band practice; See you later Mr. R!" I say bolting out the door.I stash my stuff in my locker and nonchalantly walk into Room 112 . Good thing it's right next to my locker. "Hi guys!" I say to my band-mates as I enter the room. "Sorry I'm late; I fell asleep in class." I admit, blushing slightly as I rub the back of my head.
"Again?" The remark came from the guitarist, Tori."You gotta get some sleep Kayori-chan." He says with a laugh as he taps on my head; being 5'3 has it's disadvantages.
'I know...I know.." I say with a yawn as I pull out my song sheets. I look around and then turn to Tori. "Hey, where's Moto and Noriko?" I ask without looking up as I read my papers.
"Moto-san had a doctor's appointment." Tori says as he tunes his guitar. "And Noriko-chan is in the bathroom; She should be..."
"Here!" Noriko calls as she steps in the entryway. I have a feeling she went to the bathroom to change because she is now wearing a pair of tight blue jeans and a white halter top; unlike Tori and I who are still in our school uniforms. I jot down a mental note reminding myself to bring an extra pair of clothes tomorrow. Wearing the school uniform is hell enough."Did I miss anything good?" She asks as she walks past me and takes her seat at the drums.
"Nope." I flip through more pages of songs. "Do you guys have any idea of what we should play on Friday?" I ask, hoping for good suggestion; I can't decide on a song.
I can tell they both started thinking, because Tori is no longer fiddling with his guitar, and Noriko is lightly tapping a cymbal with her drumstick Finally someone speaks out."Since it's our first major performance, I vote for rock." It's Noriko. She pauses, then looks up and continues. "It will attract our crowd and at the same time grab hold of them." She smiled proudly as she crosses her arms in front of her chest.
Tori nods solemnly. "I agree."
"Me too." I chime in. I smirk to myself; I was secretly desiring a rock song anyway. Now I have the approval. "And I know exactly-" I put stress on the word 'exactly' "-what song to sing." I fix my gaze on Tori. My facial expression and a wink says it all for me. He smiles and looks upward towards Noriko.
"Ok Nori, it looks like we're playing that song again." He says with a wink to match my own. Noriko answers with a few beats of her drums concluding with a bash of her cymbal.
"Alright; Let's rock Kayori!" She calls to me before clicking her drumsticks together. "4, 3, 2 ,1!"
I smirk on the outside and my heart fills with joy as I grab the microphone. The heart is racing and my blood is pumping. I begin to sing.....
It's like I said before, my band-mates are my only friends. Tori, Noriko, and Moto are actually more of a family to me than my own. We're really close; we can even tell what each other is saying or thinking just by body language or gestures. In my eyes they are my family.
I've known Tori forever, not only is her my next door neighbor but we went to the same grade school. He's my best boy-friend and he's like an older brother I never had; and unlike a;; those other male ass-wipes my age, Tori is one of the only guys I can trust
Noriko transferred to my old school in the 8th grade and since then we've been best friends. When we first met I didn't talk to her that much. Then I heard her play the drums: Fantastic. That was the start of a beautiful friendship.
Motohiee, or Moto as I call him for short, was the last to join our group. Tori met him one summer while working a part time job. They're like best friends. Moto is also an excellent keyboardist, filling in the last piece of our puzzle of our band, Innocence 154.
It really didn't take long for us to decide on a band-name. When we first formed the group everyone figured since I'm the vocalist, I should pick the name. So I picked Innocence, going for that ironic state. Tori thought that was too plain and simple so I suggested adding 154 to the end of it; the 15 part because we were all turning 15, and 4 because their were 4 of us: Thus in the end creating the name Innocence 154
My heart beats faster at each passing day until Friday. First it's 4, then 3, then 2, 1; Finally it's Friday and I'm biting my nails like crazy. We've been practicing nonstop, and of course I'm ambitious as ever. Why then, am I so nervous? It must be a normal instinct.
I keep looking at the clock. It's 8:45 AM and I'm in art class. I close my eyes and dream it's 12 hours later and I'm prepping for my performance.
Next thing I know it's a reality. I'm backstage at Daikio café; technically I'm not backstage because the stage is a platform with a curtain in the back but you get the idea.
My heart is racing now. Half is from pure nervousness and the other half from anticipation; but I'm ready. I'm wearing a black tube top, a black leather mini skirt, and my black platform heels which strap around my ankles. To complete my ensemble my favorite thick, puck-rocker black belt is loosely and nonchalantly hanging over my hips. My waist-length amber hair is down and as shiny as ever. For the first time in my fifteen year old life I like the way I look.
As I tug on the hem of my skirt I peer through the curtain; The crowd gather like flies to an animal carcass. At least I know I'll have an audience to please.
"You alright Kayori?" A familiar voice asks me. I turn around and smile; It's Tori and he looks great. He's wearing black pants and a dark blue button down shirt. His shoulder length reddish-brownish hair is tied up in a high ponytail.
"Yeah." A pause. "I'm just nervous, that's all." I admit.
He chuckles. "Don't worry; You'll be fine." Tori says wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I smile again; I feel so safe when I'm with him.
"Yeah, you're right."
We walk over to wear we enter the stage where we meet up with Noriko and Moto. I notice Moto is dressed just like Tori, except his shirt is fire red, going great with his black and blonde hair.; and Noriko has an outfit almost like mine on except her top is red and she's wearing a white skirt.
Everyone starts preparing: Tori straps on his guitar, Noriko grabs her drumsticks, and Moto cracks his knuckles in preparation. I have no instrument so I just wait.
"And now for tonight's entertainment!"
That's out cue. The four of us walk out on stage in unison. Everyone takes their places: Tori to my left, guitar in hand,; Noriko behind me with her drum set, and Moto and his keyboard.
to my right. I'm up at the mic, front and center.
"Um....Hi everyone." My voice feels so insignificant yet it cause such an applause from the crowd. "Let me introduce ourselves; to my left is Tori Aizawa on guitar...." Tori flips a strand of hair over his ear and winks at the audience. Fan girls scream in delight. "Behind me is Noriko Ikumi on the drums..." Noriko lightly taps her drums; cheers get louder."To my right is Motohiee Nakazawa playing keyboard..." Moto gives a thumbs-up sign. The crowd is even louder now. "And I, Kayori Watanabe, am the vocalist." The cheers are loudest now; I smirk. "And we are Innocence 154! Are you ready to rock?"
My ears feel like they are going to explode as the crowd roars even louder. I turn slightly and wink to Noriko; she winks, signaling that it's time. She taps the drumsticks together."Four!" She calls out.
"Three!" Moto adds.
"Two!" Tori chimes in.
The ends of my lips curl up. "One!"
Moto starts us off; The music seems so soft, possibly calming, like it sucks allof your troubles and worries out of you. It's so different, so innocent. A distraction; you'd never expect the upcoming melody of the song. Just as I never expected all the pain and suffering in my life. I open my eyes and snap back to reality. I grab the microphone and begin to sing.
"How can you see into my eyes, like open doors? Leading you down into my core. Where I've become so numb....." The spotlight hits me when the music changes, getting it's rock-y aspect; Enter Noriko and Tori. "Without a soul. My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold. Until you find me there and lead it back home."
Here comes the strobe lights. They're like lights to flies; the crowd goes wild.
"Wake me up inside. Wake me up inside. Call my name and save me from the dark."
But no one is going to come to my rescue.
"Bid my blood to run. Before I come undone. Save me from the nothing I've become."
That's right; I am nothing. No one wants me, nobody cares. So no one will come and save me.
"Now that I know what I'm without, you can't just leave me. Breathe into me and make me real...."
I want someone to take me away. I want to give my whole self to them.
"Bring me to life."
The lights die then spark up again; The roaring crowd motivates me onward.
"Wake me up inside. Wake me up inside. Call my name and save me from the dark. Bid my blood to run, before I come undone, Save me from the nothing I've become...."
We all stop. The crowd echoes. "Bring me to life."
"Frozen inside without your touch, without your love...." I'm lost deep inside of myself."Darling, only you are the life among the dead." The person I'm looking for is my love in an ocean of betrayers.
"All this time I can't believe I couldn't see. Kept in the dark, but you were their in front of me." I can't believe I couldn't see what they were up to. I was blinded and let everyone walk all over me. I'm the one who loses in the end."I've been sleeping 1,000 years it seems; Got to open my eyes to everything." I need to open my eyes; I can't let them into my life anymore. Never. "Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul. Don't let me die here. There must be something more." But I know now I won't let it happen again. I'll just wait for my someone; the right one: They are my something more."Bring me to life."
"Wake me up inside. Wake me up inside. Call my name and save me from the dark. Bid my blood to run, before I come undone. Save me from the nothing I've become. Bring me to life." The sounds and beats around me get louder in one final conclusion. It's over. "Bring me to life."
Applause and cheers echo from the crowd as the background music and sounds as we know it fade out. We gives our bows and then exit the stage in great triumph.
"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my freaking god we did it!!!" I scream with excitement as I hug my band mates.
"Great job Kayori!" Noriko says with a smile as she gives me a big hug.
"Yeah you did great." Tori and Moto say at the same time. For some odd reason we all laugh, maybe a little too loud.
"Excuse me, are you Miss Watanabe?" An unfamiliar voice asks me. I take a deep breathe and brace myself, hoping this encounter won't end in a disaster.
Chobi: Well, that was Chapter 1. Hope you enjoyed it. Currently typing Chapter 2, and that's where it gets good. hint hint See ya soon!