And Then There Were Mustard Packets
Once, a long, long time ago, before time had even been conceived, there lived an all-powerful being. This being's name was Joe. Joe was going about his life when all of a sudden he had a weird craving. He craved something greasy, salty and just plain unhealthy. Yet he couldn't quite place what it was exactly.
As he sat there, an idea came to him. He would create beings with the same craving and hopefully they would figure out what to do. So he gathered all the dust bunnies around his house and molded the lint and dust together into weird, four legged beasts. Some flew and some swam. Some ate meat and others only ate plants. He decided to call them Barneysaurs. (Later on there was some controversy to the naming, and so scientists changed the title). However the Barneysaurs where a huge disappointment, for they may have had the same cravings as Joe, however they also had very tiny brains. So Joe threw a rock at the earth in frustration and went back to the drawing board. In his obliviousness, Joe did realized what was going on down at earth. Slowly things were growing and new creatures walked the Earth. Things were heating up.
A drop of perspiration dropped down Joe's forehead. He went and turned on the AC. He missed the string of profanity from the less hairy of the creatures over the whir of the air conditioner. As he looked down on earth, it took on the appearance of a snowball. This did not help his craving however so he returned to his plans.
Joe was getting bored and a little sleepy so he lay down and fell into slumber. As he slept, the AC broke down and the Earth started to thaw. When Joe awoke, he awoke to a whole other world. There were two legged creatures walking around as if they owned the place! He went down the elevator to Earth and looked around. The closest building had two golden arches and somehow Joe felt drawn to them. He walked in and looked around. A beautiful and strange noise pierced the air, "Would you like fries with that." It said.