GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS
(A PLAY IN ONE ACT)
Christopher Atkins
LIST OF CHARACTERS:
- Boy
- Girl
- Business Man
-Man
SCENE: Blank stage. A single desk behind to characters, one male, one female. Both teenagers. BOY is leaning back against the desk on its STAGE LEFT side, face down, picking at his nails. GIRL is sitting on the desk next to BOY, legs crossed, head in air, thinking pensively. On the desk is a LIFE Magazine. Next to it lies an acoustic guitar.
After thinking a moment, GIRL turns her head to BOY
GIRL:
Hello. I'm Girl.
BOY:
Hi Girl— I'm Boy.
GIRL:
Hi.
pause
So…do you like music?
BOY:
Me? Oh yeah.
GIRL:
Cool. Do you like Band?
BOY:
Yeah! Yeah, I like Band a lot.
GIRL:
They're so like…
BOY:
Awesome.
GIRL:
Yeah! Awesome!
BOY:
Yeah.
awkward pause
How about Group?
GIRL:
Oh my god, I LOVE Group! They're the best!
BOY:
I know!
BOY and GIRL take a second to muster up the courage, and then sheepishly hold hands
BOY:
You're so amazing.
GIRL:
I could pick your brain for hours!
BOY:
Grinning widely, So do it.
GIRL:
Matching his grin, enchanted, Okay.
BOY:
Okay.
GIRL:
Okay.
BOY:
Okay.
GIRL:
Searching for a topic, Ummm…
BOY:
Go on.
GIRL:
So Boy!
BOY:
Yes?
GIRL:
Have you ever…you know…wondered?
BOY:
Confused, Have I wond— about what?
GIRL:
About…you know…about life.
BOY:
About life?
GIRL:
Yeah.
BOY:
What about life?
GIRL:
Well, you know. I mean, exactly.
BOY:
Well what do you mean, "exactly?"
GIRL:
Well, haven't you just ever wondered, well… why?
BOY:
No I don't think so. Why?
GIRL:
I don't know. I was just thinking.
BOY:
But why about "why?" you were thinking?
GIRL:
I don't know, I guess I can't help it.
BOY:
But I mean…I mean…forget that.
GIRL:
Okay.
BOY:
I just mean…what does, you know, the question "why" have to do with life? That's what I mean.
GIRL:
I'm not sure, I don't think. I was just wondering it, you know?
BOY:
Nah, give me an example.
GIRL:
Like "why are we here?"
BOY:
Well, that's an easy question!
GIRL:
It doesn't seem so to me.
BOY:
Oh come on—the answer's simple! We're here to, well, live life.
GIRL:
What is life?
BOY:
Life?
GIRL:
Yeah, life!
BOY:
Well…
BUSINESS MAN, with slicked hair and a breifcase, walks behind the desk and picks up the LIFE magazine
BUSINESS MAN:
LIFE, you say? Well that's simple! Why, LIFE's a magazine!
GIRL:
Really?
B.M.:
You betcha! It's all a magazine, dontcha know! Hey if you value life, then you value magazines!
GIRL:
Woah!
BOY:
Cool!
B.M.:
And wait a minute! For just a small fee, LIFE can be yours— that's right, all you need to do is supply me with a teeny, weeny, stupid little insignificant amount of money, and I'll give you LIFE!
GIRL:
So how much does it cost?
B.M.:
Clearing his throat confidently, One dollar.
BOY:
Wow, that's a lot.
B.M.
Well that's life, kid.
BOY:
Is it worth the cash?
B.M.:
Is it worth the cash? Of course it's worth the cash! This is a bargain, kid— the magazine is LIFE! Just think about that.
BOY:
Well, okay!
GIRL:
Yeah, I'm in.
GIRL gets a dollar out of her bra, and BOY takes one out of his pants
BOY:
I feel great! Full of life!
GIRL:
Yeah! Hey, can I buy another one?
B.M.:
Sure!
GIRL:
Great! Still one dollar?
B.M.:
NO, YOU STUPID LITTLE TWAT!— NOW IT'S TWO DOLLARS DUE TO INFLATION, OKAY?
BOY:
Okay, well, here's all my money.
BOY gives BUSINESS MAN a wad of cash. GIRL does, too. BUSINESS MAN exits STAGE RIGHT
GIRL:
Wait, what's life again?
BOY:
I'm not too sure. It's all so crazy.
GIRL is intrigued with BOY, and relates to him on multiple levels and facets of her metaphysical being.
GIRL:
Oh my god, I know!
BOY:
Yeah!
There is an awkward silence as BOY and GIRL stare at each other. They kiss, lightly. GIRL giggles. BOY smiles. They kiss again. They kiss heavily.
GIRL:
Boy, I have something to tell you.
BOY:
Yes?
GIRL:
I think I'm in love with you.
BOY lets go of GIRL quickly, and takes one step back
What's wrong?
BOY:
Nothing's wrong.
GIRL:
What happened?
BOY:
Nothing happened.
GIRL:
Did I say somethi—
BOY:
No!
BOY laughs nervously
No not all. It's just… okay, yes. Yes, I love you.
GIRL:
You do? Really?
BOY:
…yeah!
GIRL:
Great!
BOY:
Unenthused, Great.
GIRL:
Will you come sit with me on this desk here?
GIRL sits on the desk
BOY:
No! I, uh, I can't. I've got a family thing, you know. Really busy this weekend.
GIRL:
Oh, okay. Maybe later, then?
BOY:
Yeah. Sure. I guess. I mean, whatever.
Long pause
GIRL:
Um, Boy?
BOY:
Yes?
GIRL:
It's already next week. Will you sit with me now?
BOY reluctantly:
Um, sure, I guess.
BOY sits. GIRL leans on him. BOY is uncomfortable, GIRL is on cloud nine
GIRL:
Mmm, isn't it all so lovely?
BOY:
What is?
GIRL:
Life.
BOY:
I guess so.
BOY looks at GIRL
You know, Girl, I've been thinking.
GIRL:
Yes?
BOY:
I don't … think I can be with you any more. Don't get me wrong, I mean, I like you a lot, but I'm just…I'm just going through some personal stuff right now. It has nothing to do with you— honestly.
GIRL:
But I thought you said you loved me!
BOY:
I do love you.
GIRL:
Then why are you leaving me?
BOY:
I don't love you anymore.
GIRL:
WHAT?
BOY:
I'm sorry.
BOY turns his back. GIRL cries gently
GIRL:
Softly, I hate you.
GIRL turns her back on BOY
I hate life! There is no love! Love is just a chemical! No one can love!
BOY:
Oh no, what have I done? I … am in love with girl! Ever since the beginning? How could this be? How could I have not known? I love her more than words can express! IT IS THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL TIME! I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS THIS WAY! Oh how my heart aches, starves, hungers for her beautimous visage! I know! I'll write her a song! Then she'll have to love me.
BOY picks up the guitar, starts strumming and sings
Girl! Girl!
BOY stops singing, puts down the guitar, and with excitement turns to GIRL
GIRL:
Go away! I don't love you anymore! I'm over you and I HATE you!
BOY places his hand on his heart
BOY:
Oh no! The pain! No— no this can't be happening! But it is! I love you girl! Oh God! Truly I am the most depressed soul on the planet— NO ONE HAS FELT AS MUCH SORROW AS I AM FEELING RIGHT NOW! Oh God! Oh God oh God oh God! Wait what about God? Does he even exist? Who is He? Or She? No, He couldn't possibly exist— because if he did there would be world peace! Oh my God, I shouldn't have said that! He might be real, and He might have heard that! I blasphemed! Oh God I'm sorry! Wait, do I really want to assume that God exists? I mean, what if He doesn't? I don't want to put in a bunch of effort for nothing. Then again I don't want to be tortured for all eternity, either, and the human mind is incapable of perceiving eternity. So, I guess, if you multiply that by lots of pain, that's not very good. Oh, girl, I miss you! You're my whole world!
GIRL turns to BOY
GIRL:
Oh boy, I was lying before because I was hurt, but I still love you!
BOY:
Frightened and uninterested, You what? Um, I mean…you do? Uhh…see I've got this thing and…
GIRL turns back
GIRL:
BOYS ARE PIGS! THEY ARE DISGUSTING AND I HATE THEM. THEY NEVER CALL AND THEY SHOULD DIE. I WANT TO BE A LESBIAN!
BOY:
NO I LOVE YOU!
MAN enters STAGE RIGHT, and kisses GIRL
BOY:
What? Girl, who's this?
GIRL:
This is Man. We're in love.
BOY:
What? He's using you!
GIRL:
No he's not! He would never do such a thing! He's kind and gentle and sweet— unlike some other people I know.
BOY:
But he's already out of college and you're just sixteen! What are you thinking?
GIRL:
You don't understand! He's different.
MAN exits STAGE RIGHT abruptly
Man! No!!
BOY:
Ha-ha! I told you he'd hurt you!
GIRL:
No! Damn the world! Damn you!
GIRL drops to her knees and begins to scream— ear-shatteringly so
BOY:
Girl! No! Stop! Oh I can't bear to watch it all happen! I can't bear your pain! And I can't bear the world or its cruelty! Why, God, why?
BOY falls to his knees, screaming as loud as he can, in unison with GIRL. A long moment of screaming passes, and then BOY and GIRL stop. They both rise and face each other. There is an awkwardness between them, because they haven't seen each other in years.
BOY:
Oh, hi there.
GIRL:
Um, hello.
BOY:
Wow, it's been while.
GIRL:
Yeah. How are you?
BOY:
Oh, I'm fine. How are you?
GIRL:
Fine.
Short pause
BOY:
I've been…I've been thinking lately.
GIRL:
Yes?
BOY:
About self, and the, well…do you know who I am?
It's been bothering me lately.
GIRL:
Why, you're Boy.
BOY:
Well see that's just it. Who's Boy?
GIRL:
You.
BOY:
Yes yes, I know, and you're Girl. But that doesn't explain anything, does it? I mean, what does that explain? That doesn't explain anything.
GIRL:
You're right— this is a fascinating concept. Who are we? And why? Yes, we are Boy and Girl, but who are they? And WHY?
BOY:
Exactly! Now you're getting the hang of it!
GIRL:
Oh Boy, you're so deep! You've changed so much.
BOY:
And I feel the same way about you! Your non-sensical crypticism and pensiveness sets my loins on fire!
GIRL:
So interesting, how we have evolved like this. We're so much more mature, now. We think about new things— we're no longer the clichéd adolescents, the ignorant little naïfs that we once were…you know?
BOY:
I know!
GIRL:
Yeah.
BOY:
Wow.
A long pause, during which BOY and GIRL reflect happily upon each other's meaningfulness. They kiss
GIRL:
I guess that's life.
BOY:
What's life?
CURTAIN