In the land of paparazzis
My eyes bulge out my head
The sediment of past American Culture
Has been compressed to a diamond

It's got me reading periodicals
That tell me how to lose weight
Says, "Buy our product, no matter if it works
We'll take it for a wage"
Got me watching Access Hollywood
And boy I'm shitting in my pants
Better not get up or else
I'll miss this VH1 program

They are building an army
In LA, in New York
They are building an army
Watch the youth turn into fops

Building an army because we really need to know
Who we can make fun of when their clothes are out style
Well hey there mister celebrity I dig those nice shiny rims
Now tell me for the tabloids whose pants you're getting in?
Building an army and its all across the TV screens
Box office bonanza bash and season premiers
A staple of society, the celebrities help us look up
Oh my, what a grand example of how I'm so insignificant

Building an army, but whatever is it for?
Well have you never seen little epigones running off to war?
They have cash in their little hands and they're making purchases
A staple of society indeed, but I call this cult pointless.