I'm sure all of you have heard some version of this story before, all of them claim to be absolutely true, well, not all of them are, but they are all based from this one.

The untrue versions of this story you have heard probably end as well as the circumstances would allow. With the police dashing in and performing some form of rescue or whatever. That's bullshit, this isn't the fiction spewed by wide-eyed horny college kids who have had a little too much to drink.

This is the true thing, like them cigarette ads NO BULL right?

Well here's how it really plays out.

You see this chick, her name is Crystal she was baby-sitting some brats, little rich fucks, the type mommy and daddy spoil rotten. Crystal, well she's the type, the blonde bombshell type, big tits, kinda round shaped, but not too much, got the money, wears the state sweaters, screws the team captains for various different sports, yeah you know the type.

Anyway this is about ten years or so ago, yeah long time right? Well for this tale, it's timeless, at least for now. Heh, hah.

Crystal she's baby sitting for these kids right, and she's already put them to sleep and she's sitting on the couch and watching a movie. What type of movie, doesn't matter, no one really cares. Crystal's watching her movie and the phone rings, so she answers it. And what does she hear on the receiver? Well she picks it up.

"Hello?" She says. And all that is heard on the other side of the receiver is laughing, a man laughing hysterically. She asks him what he wants, but there's no reply. So she hangs up, and at first I imagine she's kinda concerned ya know, but then she thinks nothing of it and continues watching her movie.

About twenty minutes later the phone rings again, she picks it up.

"Hello?" She asks, and all she hears is the deep laughter again, the dude on the line obviously is laughing it up at something. "Stop calling me!!!" Crystal shouts FrUstrated. Slightly sCared, and Konfused she tries to put it out of her mind, but twenty minutes later the phone rings again. When she picks up the phone again, deep voice replies to her answer this time.

"Ding, Dong, Dips

My name is mister Chips

I hack up little kids

Well Ding, Dong, Dee

I just killed three

While you were downstairs ignoring me." The voice se(z). (x)

Crystal is really scared by this time; she realizes that the killer had been calling her from upstairs the whole time using the extension line. She starts to run out of the house, but right when she is leaving the killer walks down the stairs wielding a bloody butcher knife. This man is like the devil incarnate he is a tall gaunt guy, with dark shabby hair, looks kind of like a homeless guy or something.

Crystal panics then, she can't move, her body functions go out of control, she laughs and cries at the same time. And the killer gets her, stabbing her right in the heart with his butcher knife.

This is all true, don't fucking forget either. You know how I know this story is true, well my aunt's friends cousin didn't witness it, no sirree.

You see I'm the maniac, I killed the kids, I killed Crystal, and I liked it.