The Cute Little Hostile Alien
By Timothy Hazelo and Lady Glass
Written by Timothy Hazelo
"-Ooooooooooooo…" Tim and Stephanie finished yelling "no" and looked over at Molly.
"Idiots" She said then rolled her eyes. "Why were YOU two yelling and not me?"
They both started to cry and they said, "We miss Bilafoabulala!"
"Idiots…" She repeated. "It was, Lalabufoalabi…" She again rolled her eyes.
"Oh…" They both said, then looked at Xenu, and remembered they were actually in his presence, and started to bow and chant.
"So…You're my father…How could you prove that???" Molly asked.
"Weellll, I cant really dude…" He said. "But your not like normal little girls Molly, your from outer space maaaannnn!!! And that is why your So Different!!!"
"Ah…That explains it…" She lied gently for the sake of her not wanting to listen to that god forsaken slang.
"So…Who is Molly's mother???" Stephanie and Tim said in the Exact same tone at the exact same time. "HAHA! We did it again!!!" They said then continued to say, "We did it again…We did it again!…" Over and over…
"SHUT UP!" Xenu said. "You two are way annoying…Man." He rolled his eyes. "As far as her mother goes…" He then looked down at the duck that Stephanie was holding…The one that thought he was a cat…
"Oh my god" Molly said with an annoyance in her voice. Then, a thought bubble came out of her ear, it showed a picture of Xenu, and then a "" and then a picture of a duck, and then a "" and finally a picture of her with a question mark at the end. "That just doesn't make sense…" Molly exclaimed.
"Well, we will SOON find out!!!" Xenu busted out.
Then Stephanie and Tim started to jump up and down and then started saying, "Rubber ducky in a little coat! Rubber ducky in a little coat!!!" And pointed to ducky who was wearing a little coat… Then they went back into reality and asked, "How would we figure it out so soon!?"
Then, Xenu smiled and said, "I have set us up for an episode of Dr. Phil!!!!" In a high squeaky voice because he was excited…
"Oh god…" Molly said. She was so sorrowed that she was almost imagine crying, but she didn't, because…Well…Its Molly…
Finally, after one minute of driving the super-fast space ship to Las Vegas, they were in the waiting room for Dr. Phil. Then they heard his voice…
…"WHERES MY MOTHER FUCKING COFFEE!!! I NEED MY COFFEE IF I'M GOING TO HELP THESE IDIOTS ON NATIONAL TV!!!!" He yelled.
"That really doesn't sound therapeutical…" Stephanie said, then started squealing because she actually used a big word, but quickly forgot what she was squealing about.
"I would have to agree…" Xenu said, still in his surfer-voice.
After thirty minutes of waiting they were finally on the stage of the show, and then they saw Dr. Phil coming from behind the stage.
"This alien Xenu is convinced that this little girl Molly's mother is this duck with a little coat on it." He said in a sad, yet agonizingly staged voice.
"He is delusional…" Molly said. "He also thinks he's my father."
Suddenly after those words were said, Xenu had a very sad expression on his face…He even started to tear up.
"Tests have said that the duck is not in any way related to Molly…" Dr. Phil said. "I know this is sad for you Xenu…But you just have to let go…"
"Ok…" Xenu said, then let go of the button on his device. Then, Dr. Phil's head exploaded! Molly leaped up in joy as she saw the violence.
"I don't care what he said…This ducky is your mother!!!" Xenu said…
Suddenly, they noticed that it was fake blood, and it was a costume, then, a green woman with big eyes and a weird shaped head crawled out of Dr. Phil's body. "There is no such thing as Dr. Phil…He was an alien all along…The one that you conceived a baby with Xenu…" The alien that came out of Dr. Phil said. "My name is Xenita…"
Author's Note: This chapter by Tim, next chapter by Lady Glass...in about another four months. Sorry for the delay. Actually, Tim wrote this chapter months ago and even sent it to me but we both kept forgetting to post it. So after, we aren't much different from the characters we play in this story!