What Do You Want Me To Feel?

Nightmares, dreams, and spinning awareness,
the wheels churning in my head,
I once was found, but now I'm lost,
fills my thoughts with dread.
I used to think I was so strong,
nothing could ever break me,
but all is lost now, I do not care,
what will be will be.
Try I might to understand,
this overrated life,
my heart aches so much with pain,
just go ahead and twist the knife.
There's a hammering in my head that won't go away
I guess it will go in time,
but I will remember you all,
cuz this life could stop--on a dime.
Some say "wasted" some say "Its's His will"
it doesn't matter now, and it never will.
Try you may to understand,
try to know my pain,
you will never know my pain, my friend,
your tries are all in vain.
See you later?
Yeah I guess.
But secretly I'm thinking
Maybe no, maybe yes.