Wow. What a weekend, hey? It was great to see you again.
But man did you confuse me. All over again.
And now I don't think I'll ever get over you.
It's scary to say, I think.
The weird bit is that I barely know you so I shouldn't really like you as much as I do. I've never really known you, as matter of fact, yet I still liked you all that time ago.
It's kind of embarrassing really.
There were so many moments this weekend where I just wondered... what if...
But I know that you give it around easily.
I hit you a lot over the weekend didn't I?
Well, you don't know what it means.
Whenever I hit you, it's because what you do confuses me. I didn't realise it until now... It's such a subconscious reaction.
It's been going on since forever I think.
That's why I abuse you so much.
But you confused me so much this weekend. Please don't to that to me.
I just want to be friends. It's easier that way.
But I can't help it.
Why did you have to hug me?
Why did you have to do that thing you did to my bruises? They weren't even all that bad anyway.
Confused me as hell.
It was sweet though, which is what confused me.
Why do you have to do what you do??
Well, I wonder when I'll see you again. It could be a fair while.
But till then, I wonder how I'll be. I know how I get when I have all these brief moments with you.
All this is quite sappy really.
But maybe next time I see you I'll be over you?
Maybe... just maybe.
But somehow I don't think so.
And that other guy?
What other guy?
He was there this weekend too. But I just didn't seem to realise that he was around when you were.
I don't want to have to go through all of this all over again. It was too hard the first time around, and I didn't even really know what I was feeling then.
But now I know.
But now I know that it could never happen, that nothing will ever happen.
And that's what makes it all the more harder.
I still can't help this... feeling... as much as I know that nothing will happen.
And so it hurts.
And will continue to do so until...
Until something else happens to take my mind of you for a while.
Like that other guy.
But it took a while for him to come along.
Now, for me, he doesn't really exist, and it will probably continue that way until... until I forget about you for a fraction of my life.
Then he'll come back.
And it will all be fine until...
Until I see you again.
And then begins again the vicious cycle known as YOU.
Well, after a break away... certainly some interesting things to write. For you guys waiting for NGIR... I apologise HEAPS AND HEAPS AND HEAPS... I've got a whole lot of stuff that I have to write out for it, but yeah, there's a lot of stuff stopping me from just sitting down. I also haven't been in the right frame of mind to go back to those moments yet. So just hold up for a bit. Thanks. :)