With Liberty and Justice for All...Unless Your Derek
The Unforgettable Sound
Summary: Derek hates God because of all the evil things he's done to him-killing his brother and boyfriend, making his dad a drunk, his mother a hooker...Liam doesn't really have a religion, but he loves God and thanks him for what's good in his life. Can Liam change Derek's outlook on God before Derek takes drastic measures to get rid of all the pain? Slash, M/M.
A/N: I've been tossing this idea around in my head for a few months, and I've decided that I'm going to go with it. I do believe in God, so Derek's views do not reflect my own. However, if you don't believe in God or don't think he's as almighty as everyone else in this world does, I'm fine with that. I'm not going to judge you by your outlook on God.
"And to the republic, for which it stands, one nation under God--"
Derek scrunched up his nose. God. What had God ever done for him? Made his father a drunk and his mother a hooker. Made his father beat him when he was drunk and act like nothing happened when he was sober (which was hardly ever anymore). And God made his brother and boyfriend die in that car accident three years ago.
That's what God did to him. And that's why Derek was an atheist.
(Derek had dark brown hair that people often thought was black, he weighed122 pounds, he was 5'5", and he had blue eyes.)
The outcast atheist, rock obsessed, freaky goth, gay boy at school. No friends, teachers hate him, and the only person who could possibly relate to him was the other outcast at school that dressed absolutely nothing like him...On most occasions.
"Derek, please tell us once again why you don't say the Pledge of Allegiance?" Mr. Scouts, Derek's second hour History teacher asked, an amused smile on his lips.
"Because I don't believe the God is as almightily powerful over our country as you all do. For that matter, I don't think God is powerful at all. The bastard never did anything for me, why should I have faith in him?"
"So does that mean you worship the devil?" a blond cheerleader asked.
Derek whipped his gaze to her. "Satan is no better...He is still somewhat of a God, no matter which way you look at it, and I don't believe he deserves my faith either...No one does," he closed his eyes. Except for you...he thought as an image of his old boyfriend entered his mind. Why'd you have to die? I miss you so fucking much.
"So what do you think will happen to you when you die?" an 'emo' kid to his left asked.
"I'll become a ghost and haunt all of your children and your children's children for the rest of eternity..." Derek whispered. Silence fell in the room. Derek stood up and left the classroom. He opened his locker and threw in his books before taking out a pack of cigarettes and limping down the stairs to the front entrance of the school rapidly.
Liam looked up at his teacher from the book. "243?" he asked/stated. Math was his worst subject in school. She laughed at him and went onto the next person.
He shook his head and sighed tiredly. The last week at home had been horribly hard. His mother had started drinking and his older sister had started drugs. He wasn't abused in any way, but it wasn't the best environment for him, anyone knew that.
(Liam had green eyes, dark blond hair that was often confused for brown, he was 5'8", and he weighed120 pounds.)
"Ms. Flate, can I be excused to the nurse? I'm not feeling well," Liam asked.
"If you haven't thrown up on my floor, then no," she replied and gave Liam an evil glare.
She then turned her back to sit down at her desk and Liam shoved a finger down his throat, making him throw up onto Ms. Flate's beautiful carpet.
"Go to the nurse now Mr. Hart!" she screeched. Liam took off. He didn't stop at his locker, didn't stop at the nurse's office, didn't stop until he was completely out of breath and could hardly move.
"I hate those fucking teachers!" he gasped into the clearing.
"Well, then, that makes two of us," a voice said. Derek emerged from behind a pile of rocks, lighting up a cigarette as he did so.
"Hey, you're that one kid...who was arrested for "possession of illegal drugs,""
Derek blew out a stream of smoke and stared at him. "How d'you know about that?"
"Ms. Flate told the class...I'm Liam, by the way,"
"Derek," he replied after staring at him a moment longer. "I'm a gay atheist, just so you know. You're not entitled to be my friend now that you know my name,"
"But I want to be your friend," Liam stuttered quickly. "I'm gay, too, but I'm not an atheist,"
"That's cool with me, as long as you're cool with me being an atheist," Derek said, taking one last drag from the cigarette before throwing it on the ground.
"Don't shove your religion down my throat and I won't shove mine down yours," Liam replied. "So..."
"God, I fucking hate this place,"
"Well, that makes two of us," Liam said with a grin. "I thought you didn't believe in God?"
Derek gave him a black stare, which washed the grin away. Then he let out a light laugh.
"You're not that bad of a guy, Liam," he said, fiddling with another cigarette.
"Something's wrong, isn't it?" Liam asked, zoning out at the cigarette between Derek's long fingers.
"Why?" Derek replied. Liam cringed at the edge in his voice.
"Well...People who smoke tend to smoke a lot more when there's something wrong..." he answered timidly.
"Nothing's wrong...I just have.... a serious smoking problem," Derek snapped.
"Sorry," the younger boy replied. Derek let out a sigh.
"No, I'm sorry...I shouldn't've snapped at you..." he said, sitting down on one of the rocks slowly. "My parents are fighting...And my dad's beatings have gotten worse and way more frequent, and...three years ago my brother and boyfriend died in a car accident, and I'm just experiencing the shock,"
"Oh...Sorry," Liam said. A silence followed.
"It's alright...It's not like you tried to do it," Derek replied, throwing the unlit cigarette on the ground.
"So..." Liam said again, picking up a stick and drawing in the dirt.
Derek took a razorblade from his pocket and brought it to his wrist, slicing ever so lightly.
"Mmm?" Liam mumbled, focusing on the baby in his drawing.
"Have you ever...cut yourself?" Liam shoved the stick in the wrong direction and stared up at him.
"Are you fucking kidding me? No!" Liam brought his gaze to the blood dripping from Derek's wrist, who had his head back and was breathing in deeply from his nostrils. His eyes were closed. "Derek..." Liam said with a small gasp. "You..."
"Yes...I do...and I hate it...I mean, it releases more than ever but I still hate it..."
"Can't you find a different way to release?"
"Yeah, when your mother's a hooker and your fathers a drunk, it's so easy to talk to them," he replied sarcastically. "I've even tried therapy...The only thing out got out of that was having fun with making my homophobic therapist to blush deeply every time I told him about my sex life," Derek laughed lightly. Liam walked over to him and put his hand on his bleeding wrist. Derek looked at him, then down at his wrist.
"I want to help..." Liam explained softly. Derek swallowed.
"No one's ever wanted to help me before," he replied, matching Liam's quiet tone. "Ever...with the exception of Matt, but he died in the car crash along with my brother,"
"Who was Matt?"
"I...I don't really feel comfortable talking about it," Derek snapped, his voice faltering as tears came to his eyes.
Liam licked his lips before answering. "He was your last boyfriend wasn't he?" Derek nodded, biting his bottom lip. "I'm sorry,"
"Once again," Derek replied with a sharp edge to his voice, taking his hand away from Liam. "I don't need your sympathy-you didn't kill them,"
Liam stared at the blood on his hand, and then at Derek. "No wonder you have no friends! You act like you want and need sympathy, and then when someone gives it to you, you bite their head off like you don't need anyone!"
Derek glared down at his wrist. "You're right," he said quietly before taking a towel from his pocket and pressing it down to his wrist. "I'm sorry,"
Liam took the towel from Derek and wrapped his wrist for him. "It's alright...You have a reason to be pissed off, I guess...With all that's going on, not to mention being hated by everyone,"
"See...That's what Matt helped with. He loved me for who I was and whenever I felt like no one loved me, he'd be there to comfort me and show me otherwise,"
God, would I love to be that person, Derek...You don't know how long I've waited to talk to you, Liam thought as he finished wrapping his wrist. "There..."
"Thanks," Derek said softly before looking up at Liam. Liam coughed and tore his gaze away.
"You're welcome," he said as he sat back down on the tree stump.
"I'm sorry I'm such an asshole," Derek said, picking at one of his scabs. "I do that when I meet people...I don't get close to people because I'm worried about them hurting me like everyone else has,"
Liam looked up at him. "You're the first person that I know who has ever felt that way that actually admitted it," Derek gave him a small smile.
"I know who I am, and all those days at lunch alone give you a lot of time to think,"
A bell rang in the distance, signaling the start of lunch hour. "Hey, Derek...Would you like to get lunch somewhere? It's been so long since I've eaten with someone that I forgot what it's like,"
Liam watched as Derek tensed up, and then loosened as he sighed. "Yeah, sure...It'd be nice to sit with someone for a change,"
Liam smiled and stood as he extended a hand for Derek to grab. "Well, then...Let's go,"
If you're wondering....I put the descriptive paragraphs about Liam and Derek in parentheses because I couldn't find a place to put them. I had already written most the chapter when I found that I didn't have a descriptive paragraph about either, so...yeah...