Lackluster Regret

You were ever watchful,

Always seeming to trail behind me,

But my shadow easily hid your shining face

As you did everything in your power to resurface.

Your own identity is all you wished for,

But mine already stood out too brightly

With my odd sense of myself and everything around me.

I watched you retreat within yourself

As I tried to move aside

And let you personality glow brilliantly.

But that color has long been gone

As you've faded into the pulsating crowd

Of sweaty bodies and screaming fans

Making it hard to coax out that being I knew well

From deep inside your heart.

Instead, the person I now reveal to the world

Is a lackluster one,

Blending simply into the darkness

You've been pushed into for so long.

And it was all my doing,

With my inconceivable detachment.

You always said I was perfect

With my good grades and my kind manner,

But I know differently.

I envy your clich├ęd life of drama

With love and music and family

And I know you sadly envy mine.

So I'll try once again to stand aside

And show that smile we've wanted to remember,

Easily lost among the constant sadness and frailty

As you slowly becoming someone again.

Now I silently step out of your path,

Allowing myself to be cast into your shadow.