Black, Red, & Silver
by K's Moonshadow
I watch the black invade,
Thick & viscous; dampening but not slow.
It makes me want to cry;
So tired of being here, being anywhere.
No escape; the red cannot make a path through the black.
What scares me is I don't know
If it is by choice, or by force.
Am I saved or condemned?
That is the easy question.
I breathe the black in deep,
Through my mouth, nose, ears, my very pores.
It's sucking the life out of me
And I'm powerless to stop it.
Searching for redemption,
Receiving only punishment.
The price is more than I can pay;
The suffering more than I can bear.
Living just brings more emptiness,
Pain & sorrow leaving giving only scars.
When you have to ask the question,
Is life really worth all this?
The answer can't be good.
Emptiness follows in the black's wake;
Wondering which is better: pain or numbness (nothing).
Worthless days turn to sleepless nights,
Spent painting red swirls in the black.
Red brings relief; payment.
Never tricks, always fair,
Soon, however, it will require too much
And take the heart of me.
Black I am scared of.
Somewhat unknown, takes but never gives.
No escaping from the black
Once it comes completely, you disappear.
Red is easier, more desirable,
But black is where I belong.
And the red will never satisfy it,
No matter how much the silver releases.
Silver is just the tool; not good nor bad.
No, I am bad, so now I must pay.
Right now I can only manage red from silver,
But the black will soon be here to stay.