Pat Robertson, I see you spit your holy maxims on the 700 Club
Evangelist righteous Christian right-wing partisan from day one
You talk about absolutist truths, but out of your mouth come inane flukes
We love, we pray; we rip on gays – Pat Robertson I write for you:

Your words can stop the hurricanes, you Rasputin Godsend
But only once, your money's worth, did nature avoid CBN
Your live audience thinks that you're a real good Christian inside
But they've never been gypped by your tricks or worked in your diamond mines

Pat Robertson, with a sinister grin, natural leader to the American Christian cause
Speak your spite in sacred light and tell what God thinks is going wrong
Tell everyone about what Jesus said, use your support to run the Republicans
Closed-minded bigot, sexist, capitalist – Pat Robertson, I write for you:

Pat Robertson and saintly ones, let's take over the United States
No more right to abortion, no more separation of church and state
Pat Robertson, we'll talk a bunch, on TV cameras during state of the unions
You'll tell the people all you can – you're running the country like your dictator friends

Ariel Sharon got a stroke because he pulled out of the Gaza Strip
Hugo Chavez threatens Western hegemony, so let's assassinate him
Dover, Pennsylvania, you heathens denied intelligent design
Abolish annoyances and common sense when Pat Robertson touts his lines!