Chapter 29
Summer
"Summer, wake up. Let's go get some breakfast," Dustin said from the other side of the bed. I poked my head out from the under of the covers and looked at the time.
"Dustin, it's only seven-thirty for Christ's sake. You're never up this early." I reburied myself under the blankets.
He was having none of that.
"Wakey, wakey sunshine! There's this new place over by work that I want to try," he said and he – being the evil big brother that he is – pulled all of the blankets off of me and the bed.
It was not pleasant.
"Dustin! It's too early to go to breakfast!" I whined but got out of bed anyway. "I hate you."
"No, you don't," he said. "You love me and you know it. Now come on and get ready. All of the old people are going to take our spot if you keep moving like a snail." Dustin had already put on a pair of pants and was currently searching for a shirt in his closet. I just mumbled to myself and started to move slowly to my room to get dressed.
Now, I bet you're all wondering why I'm not screaming my head off because I'm so mad at Vyn right now, right? Right, don't even try to deny it. You all want the scoop on what's going to happen.
Well, the only reason why I'm not over at Vyn's place right now is because Dustin threw the biggest tantrum last night about what happened. Not only did he call the principal – and he left very scary messages – but he attempted to go over to Vyn's house and wanted to decapitate him, but mom managed to stop him.
"We will deal with this when the time is right Dustin. You probably forgot that I am friends with his mother and she doesn't deserve you going over there and start yelling and doing god only know what else," she told him. He wasn't happy about it but when Asia and I told him to just deal with it later on, he sighed and said fine. The rest of the night, the three of us were down in the basement watching some movies. It was around two in the morning when I crawled into Dustin's bed and left the other two on the couches.
For about an hour, I couldn't get back to sleep. The whole night came crashing down on me and I started to cry. My sister got humiliated in front of the whole school and I find out that my boyfriend – ex-boyfriend – was screwing his ex-girlfriend's brains out.
I thought I could trust Vyn. Hell, I even thought I loved him. No, no, I do love him. He was the only person to show me that there was something more to me than I thought there was. The funny thing is that I fell in love with him in like, what, two months? Three months? Hell, I don't know anymore.
I guess I really don't know him that well. It's kind of scary how I just jumped into the relationship. The one thing that I will take out from this is not to jump into things without truly knowing what you're getting into. But you know, I don't regret it. I don't regret one moment that I spent with him. He brought me away from the ugly part of my life. Okay, okay, my life isn't that bad I guess.
My mom and I may not see eye to eye every now and then, but I love her. She's the one who took care of Asia, Dustin, and me when my jerk of a father walked out on us. These past few weeks I noticed a bit of a change between me and mom. I don't feel like I'm going to get yelled at every time I walk in the door.
Dustin has taken dad's spot in my life. He's always been the one to watch out for me and show me love that a father figure should show.
But back to the subject. Vyn and I had some good times. But good memories aren't the only thing that I can hang onto anymore. I just can't turn my head anymore and be self-centered.
It's my turn to step up and stop being a little chicken shit…after my morning breakfast with Dustin, of course.
The warm sun beat down on me from me my spot on the park bench. A breeze blew through the park, keeping everyone from getting too hot. The perfect afternoon.
"Summer." I opened my eyes and picked up my head.
There he stood. The man I loved but couldn't hold onto. I would never be enough to hold him to me.
"Hey," I said quietly. I gave him a smile and patted the spot next to me on the bench. He looked at me and slowly took a seat next to me. I sat up and put my elbows on my knees and took a deep breath.
I can do this...
It was several minutes before either of us said anything to each other.
"I know I screwed up, Sum…" he started and trailed off. Another deep breath and he started again. "I screwed up big time-"
"Tell me something, Vyn," I said and looked at him. His beautiful eyes were staring right through me. He nodded his head for the okay. "Do you love me?" He didn't even hesitate.
"You know I do."
"Do you love Taylor?"
At this, he hesitated to answer me. He looked away to the ground in front of him and closed his eyes. I kept my eyes on him and waited for my answer.
"I did-"
"Don't lie to me Vyn," I said calmly.
"I'm not lying to you!" he snapped and brought his face back up. Anger was set in his eyes and a little bit of sadness.
"Then was it just a spur of the moment that you had sex with her? Or has this been going on for a while?" I asked, as I crossed my arms and sat back against the bench. If it was a spur of the moment thing, then I could probably deal with it with not killing something. If it was happening for a while…then Vyn could probably start digging his own grave right about now.
Vyn looked at me with his green eyes and tried to hide something from me.
My life has officially ended…
"Summer, you have to believe me when I say that I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."
"You know, they all say that. Did you pick that out of a book or something?" I asked sarcastically. He was avoiding my question and trying to get back on my good side at the same time. I took a deep breath in and decided to move on. "You never answered my question."
"Yes, it has been going on for a while," he said simply. He wasn't looking at me anymore. He found the ground to be more interesting than this conversation.
Remember that whole that started to form when I thought Vyn had cheated on me? Yeah, well, it's back. Funny how you can know of something and it doesn't actually start killing you until you find out it's the truth.
I took a deep breath and didn't even try to hide the tear that fell down my cheek.
"Summer, please-"
"You know what? I'm broken up over the fact that you have been going behind my back for who knows who long. But, what's even worse is that fact that I fell in love with you without getting to know you that well. I have realized that I don't even know the real you. Hell, we basically just have a physical relationship. Have you noticed that?" I asked and took another deep breath. Yeah, I was upset over Vyn getting it on with Taylor, but also that I didn't see it. I was as ignorant as a stupid fucking tree stump. It makes sense now when I look back on it all. The get together with his friends – Taylor was there and all over him. The school hall – the attempted kiss that I saw. And then, the few days before prom where he kept canceling on me. It was all there. I was just blind to see it.
"Excuse me?" Vyn suddenly yelled and finally looked me in the eye for the first time. "Are you blaming this all on me? Doesn't it take two to tango, Summer? Maybe I didn't open up to you, but you did the same exact thing by not opening up to me. And you know what? You are so goddamn insecure when it comes to me. You know how I know? That day in the hallway after school with Taylor. For fuck's sake I was just talking to her and all of a sudden you look at me like I killed someone! And then when I told you about Taylor the night we went over to Eric's, you fucking freaked out on me, even if you didn't show it.
"You're not a hard person to read, Summer," he said as he looked down at me sitting on the bench. "You may think that you're some bad ass who doesn't give a shit, but I can tell that there is something else going on with you." His voice was now lowered and he was giving me the most intense stare I have ever received from him.
We didn't say anything for a few minutes. Vyn had his back turned to me when I talked again.
"If you can read me so well, then why didn't you say something before this?" I asked. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He was about to say something but I interrupted him. "No, don't answer that. How long has this thing between you and Taylor been going on?" I managed to keep my voice level after a few swallows. This was probably the hardest thing I have ever done.
"The night I told you about her," he said. He still wasn't looking at me and I felt like slapping him. This whole thing had – has – been going on for the last couple of weeks and I knew nothing about it. God, I'm such an idiot!
"Really," I said and started to get up. I walked over to him so that I was facing him. "Can I ask what the hell you were thinking?" I asked, starting to get angry. He finally looked at me and I wasn't exactly paying attention to what flashed through his eyes. .
"Sum…would you please let me explain everything to you without you blowing up in my face?" he pleaded. "Look, I know you're mad and everything but-"
"Of course I'm mad! You've been seeing your ex-girlfriend for the past couple of weeks without me knowing anything about it and look how I find out! Asia had to come and tell me what you were doing at prom after you ditched me!
"Besides, I don't think I need you to explain anything to me, Vyn. I'm not some stupid second grader! You were playing me at the same time you were getting your fucking kicks with some other girl. You're such an idiot."
"Then I guess we're done, aren't we?" he asked, rhetorically, as he looked at me mournfully. I couldn't help but feel like I was being torn in two when those words left his mouth. Another tear fell down my face and he reached to brush it away. I let him. "I don't love her Summer. There's some stuff that happened between the two of us that I never got around to telling you about. Now I wish I did tell you…" he trailed off.
"Didn't get around to telling me or didn't want to tell me?" I asked as I crossed my arms. Maybe I didn't tell him much about my life but I didn't keep anything from him that would hinder our relationship.
Vyn sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Didn't want to tell you, actually," he said. I just nodded and took a deep breath as I realized that I was stupid for jumping into this stupid relationship with him.
"Did we ever have anything more than a physical relationship?" I asked. Vyn didn't answer me. Instead he just looked at me.
"Can you love someone with just the physical side of the relationship filled? I don't know. But I do know that I have connected with you on some level and that I do love you," he said.
The past half hour has been hell for me. I had felt everything from sadness to hatred to losing my love. I found that what I had with Vyn wasn't like I expected it to be. I have realized that, even though, I do put up a tough front, I'm very emotional behind everything. I trust too easily. I'm stupid when it comes to relationships and I should listen to Patrick more than I do.
"Well, I guess this is it, then," I said and cleared my face of any tears that had been left behind. I reached into my pocket and brought out the necklace that he had given me. I held it out to Vyn and he looked at me like I was crazy.
"We're just going to end it then? We're not even going to try and fix anything?" he asked, his voice a little tight. I smiled and took his hand and put the red, jeweled necklace in his hand.
"Vyn, when you look back on everything, it's not worth it. We have our communication problem. We haven't totally connected on an emotional level. Not to mention you and Taylor. There's obviously something going on between the two of you and I don't want to get mixed up in it. Face it Vyn, we're not close enough to get back together."
He looked at me for a few seconds and then closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and then let it out. He fingered the necklace and put it in his pocket.
"Okay," he whispered and reached over to give me a hug. I stood there, stiff as a board for a few seconds before I returned it lightly. That's when I started to cry. Something just broke inside of me and let loose. His familiar smell, the strength that his arms offered, and his support all surrounded me in that moment. I was giving up something that I wanted to hang onto. But it would be better if I just let it go. Let him go.
We broke apart and looked at each other – possibly for the last time. He wiped the tears off my cheeks as I hiccupped. I took a deep breath to calm myself down.
As I turned around to get ready to leave, I heard the last thing that I wanted to hear.
"I love you."
"Girls, come on, we have to leave in five minutes," mom yelled from downstairs.
"Mom, there's no way that I'm going to be ready to leave in five minutes." I had just gotten out of bed like ten minutes ago. Mom had been yelling at us – not in a bad way, thank god – that we were going to go have a brunch with the grandparents and all of that.
Don't get me wrong or anything, I love my grandparents, but my love for sleep is right up there with my other highest loves. It was only ten in the morning for Christ's sake. I had a bad day yesterday and a good night sleep is all I wanted.
Yeah, I came home from the park, all red, puffy eyed, and hiccupping. I managed to make it to my Jeep without breaking down. But once I shut my door and turned on my radio – My Guardian Angel (which is by far my most favorite song by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus) came on and I immediately started bawling my eyes out. I know, I know, I didn't have that much of an emotional relationship with Vyn, but what I had with him was enough for me to love him.
Asia was all over me, wanting to know what the hell had happened to me. I just smiled, wiped the extra tears away, and told her the story. It was bad enough to live through it once, but to live through it again was horrible. I started to cry…and then Dustin came up from the basement and saw me on the couch and freaked out. You know, I thought that guys were kind of scared of girls who were crying, but not my big-over-protective-bear-of-a-brother. Nope. I finally had to beat him with a freaking pillow to get him off of me and tell him that I was fine…okay, I wasn't fine but it wasn't like I was going to die over losing my boyfriend or anything like that. Jeeze…
"Do you just want to catch up with us at the restaurant later?" she yelled up the stairs.
"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea," I said back, wrapping my hair in a towel and running to my room. I don't do the whole fast shower thing. I have to have at least twenty minutes in a shower. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not a health freak, like Asia, but I use the shower to relax. That's why Dustin is usually pounding on the bathroom door and yelling at me to get the hell out. I just laugh and continue on like I didn't hear anything at all.
"Okay, just meet us there when you're done then." I then heard the front door shut and I was left for the rest of my midmorning rituals.
Half an hour later, my hair was volumized and I had my favorite pair of black converse on. My jeans were rolled up so that I wouldn't tear any holes in them and my white shirt was spotless. Yeah, I'm caring about my image but that's only because my grandma is a stickler for nice clothes. And the one time I went to a little brunch with her and the rest of the family, she fussed over my ragged jeans and my faded black tank top. Yeah, let's just say that it wasn't a good day.
I was about to open the front door and head on out when there was a knock on the door. I stopped walking and peeped through the little peep hole. And guess who it was…
"Jacob? Why the hell are you here?" I asked/yelled as I opened the door, completely shocked. If it's not something, it's always something else that has to add more drama to my life.
"Hello there Summer," he said, quietly. "I just came by to talk to you and Asia since our little coffee date didn't work out." He stood there, with his hands in his pockets, just looking at me.
"Coffee date?" I said to myself. What coffee date was he talking about...oh, that coffee date. Hmm.
"Yeah, Ace and me just decided that it wasn't worth it," I said, bluntly.
"Yeah, I figured that one after sitting in the café for an hour," he said and stepped down off of the patio and onto the sidewalk. "Look, Summer, I know that I messed up big time and I want to fix everything," he said and looked at me with anguish in his eyes.
"Why decided to fix this now?" I asked. "It's been over how many years since you upped and left us?" My voice wasn't as loud as I expected it to be. Big surprise there.
"Because I love you guys-"
"But you love your new family more." Yeah, it hurt to know that my dad had found a new family. It hurt big time.
He just looked at me and sighed. "Look, I didn't come here to fight. I just wanted to tell you that I called off the relationship with Cindy."
…uh, what?
"You broke up with Cindy? What for?" I asked completely shocked…again.
"I'd rather you, Asia, and Dustin be here when I tell you my reasons," he said and looked like he wanted to be let into the house.
"Uh…we're all going out to breakfast with the grandparents…"Yeah, awkward.
"Okay then, I'll drop by later on this afternoon," he turned around to go back to his car. "Hey Summer?" he asked as he turned back around, halfway to his car. "Please hear me out this time? I really want this to work out."
I just nodded my head, too numb to say anything back to him. I mean, the guy called off his freaking relationship just to talk to me and Ace? There's something going on here…
Crap…mom is not going to like this, I thought to myself as he backed out of the drive way and waved to me. I waved back weakly. Very odd…
"Mom is so not going to like this," I said and went to get my car keys. I was already late for the brunch. It wouldn't be good to get grounded right before graduation, now would it?
I knew that mom was going to blow up when I told her, but my grandmother on the other hand…
"What do you mean he wants to talk to you!" she yelled and the whole restaurant looked at our table. Everyone was quiet as I was turning a bright red.
"Mom," my mom said and reached over to take her hand inheres, trying to calm her down. It felt like I was running a very high fever because my face was so hot. Asia on the other hand…it looked like she was trying to curl into something small so that she wouldn't be noticed by the people looking at us. Grandma took in a deep breath and let it out. Grandpa put his hand on her back and started to calm her down. Everyone started to go back to their meals and my face started to go back to normal.
"What did he want to talk to you about?" Dustin asked. Surprisingly, Dustin didn't say anything when I popped in, sat down, and told everyone that dad had visited.
"See, now that's the funny thing. He didn't exactly tell me. All he told me was that he called off his relationship and wanted all three of us there when he talks," I said and dug into my huge burrito, drenched in spicy green chili sauce. Yum.
At this, mom looked at me like I was insane.
"He called off his relationship but he didn't tell you why?" I nodded. "When is he going to come and talk to you guys?"
"He said later this afternoon."
"Over at the house?"
"Yeah."
"Well you can't do it! He's nothing but a huge scumbag that doesn't deserve you three. Just tell him to screw off," my grandma, Diana, said and took a drink of her ice tea. You can tell that my grandma is very well adapted to this day and age. Mom looked over at grandma and just sighed. Grandpa – Scott – looked at her as well.
"I think that you should let the children at last talk to him. Just to see what he has to say," grandpa told my mother and his wife.
As the older people continued to argue, Asia and Dustin just looked at me.
"What?" I asked as I shoved another fork-full of goodness into my mouth.
"Was Jacob serious?" Dustin asked as he took a bite from my plate.
"He looked pretty serious," I said.
"Well," Asia said, talking for the first time since I walked in, "I guess we'll find out later on."
Asia was right. Mom and the grandparents were at it for the rest of brunch. I just sat back and ate my whole burrito.
Now we were at home. Us three were sitting on the couch, with Dustin in the middle, while mom and Jacob were discussing the rules of this little conversation.
"…Got it? No guilt trips, no yelling, no anything! You came just for a talk and that's all you're getting," mom said sternly as she got up from her spot from the recliner.
"I understand it all clearly, Rachel," Jacob said in a calm tone. Mom just nodded and then turned to us. "I'll be in the kitchen if you guys need anything," she said and left the room. It was amazing that she actually left the room. When Jacob came into the house, she didn't let him out of her sight.
Jacob looked at the three of us and took a deep breath in. Well, at least he feels uncomfortable. That's a good thing, at least from my point of view.
"Right, guys, Summer probably told you that I called everything off with Cindy to talk to you," he started off. "Look, I know I messed up. There's nothing I can do that will get you guys to forgive me. But I want to make it right between the four of us again-"
"Why now?" Dustin said from his spot beside me. Asia and I were just looking at him and then we looked at each other. You could tell that we wanted Dustin to do the talking.
"I know this is going to sound bad, but…I feel immense guilt for what I did years ago. It didn't feel right to wake up in the morning knowing that my own children hate me."
"So you're just doing this to make yourself feel better?" I asked and sat up. I looked at him and could feel my hatred for him grow even more. If he was only doing this for himself then there was no point in listening to his reasons.
"No, no," he said, shaking his head from side to side. "I'm not doing this for me. I swear. I'm doing this because I love you three with all my heart…and I-I want you guys in my life again."
"Don't think it's a little late to be starting over?" Dustin asked.
"No, I don't think so."
"Dustin's twenty-three and we're about to graduate from high school and start college soon. I'd say that's a little late," Asia spoke for the first time. Jacob looked like he was going to break down any second.
"I'm not seeing Cindy anymore. I told her that my family was more important than her at this point and we just went our separate ways."
Um…wow. That's all I have to say at this point.
"So you basically think that you can come here and simply apologize to us and everything will be solved?" Dustin asked, sounding hostile.
Now I know that I should be screaming and ranting my head off and all of that, but I seriously didn't feel like it right now. These past few days have been such an overload that I just want them to be over. Everything has just come pouring over my head that I want to crawl into a hole and die.
"No, I don't think that. I know you kids hate me right now. But I'm asking for you to just give me a chance to prove that you guys mean the world to me." Jacob sat there, looking very rigid.
I looked over at Dustin and Asia and they were looking over at me. Well, isn't this productive?
"You know that you're going to have to apologize to mom before we do anything about you first, right?" Asia said. Jacob looked at her and something passed through his eyes. She must of saw it too because she sighed. "I know I said that I had forgiven you a while ago so I'm willing to give you a chance."
…What the hell just happened? Dustin looked over at her with shocked eyes. Jacob just nodded his head.
"Thank you sweetie," he said and it looked like he was going to cry.
"But that doesn't mean that I don't hate you for what you did to us," she said and got up and left the room. I wanted to go and see if she was okay but I decided to stay. Mom would check on her in a few minutes anyway.
Jacob was looking at Dustin and me, expecting our answer. The better part of me wanted to kick him and tell him to go to hell. But the other – very, very, small – part of me has wanted him back ever since he left for that Cindy girl or whatever the hell her name is.
"I hate you. I think that you're only doing this for yourself. If you really cared for us in the first place, you wouldn't have left," I said and the tears started to flow. My throat felt raw from trying to keep the tears in and it was getting hard to breathe.
"Summer, sweetheart, I was an alcoholic and pretty messed up. I thought I knew what I had, but I didn't realize how much you three mean to me before I lost you. I need you kids-"
"Don't use your alcohol problem as an excuse. And you really didn't lose us. You're the one who gave us up for Cindy. I hate you more than you could possibly ever know…" I took a deep breath and wiped the tears off of my face again.
"It's okay, babe," Dustin whispered in my ear as he gave me a big hug. I just closed my eyes for a few minutes and gathered myself back up again.
"You've hurt us and you don't deserve us back. You're a horrible father and I think it's way too late for you to start over with us," Dustin said. I didn't even bother to look at Jacob.
"Dustin, I know…believe me I know."
"You have one chance. And that's all your getting," I said and sat back from Dustin's hug. "You should always know what you have before you lose it, Jacob. Always." I grabbed Dustin's hand and we left the living room.
Three days after our little chat with Jacob, it was the seniors last day of school. Me, Asia, and a few other seniors in our psychology class were crowding by the door because we were all waiting for the stupid minute hand to hit the five so that we could all run to the senior pit and start our countdown. This was the last thing during the school year that the seniors loved the most.
"Sit down right this minute!" Mrs. Bell yelled from her desk as she saw us. We didn't bother listening to her. All of the seniors knew that we were supposed to leave at 10:25 for the countdown. Five more seconds…
"If you don't sit down right this sec-"
"GO!" I yelled as the handful of us ran out of the classroom. I think Mrs. Bell yelled something else at us but we didn't care. It was out last five minutes of high school. We weren't going to let anything ruin our last five minutes.
Out in the halls, all of this year's seniors were running and pushing people out of the way to get a good spot in the pit.
"C'mon Ace!" I yelled as I pulled on her arm, racing through the hall. I jumped over the senior wall and into the pit. People were already standing there, howling and screaming "Senior's '08! Senior's '08!" I was getting so excited as I started to yell along with them. Everyone appeared at once and suddenly the pit was so full that it was hard to move around. Everyone pilled into the pit within a minute. It was hard to hear and there was no room to move around. But we didn't care. The principal was trying to get us to calm down, quiet down, and stop completely but we didn't listen.
"THREE MINUTES!" Kenny Jones yelled as he held up the clock that showed how much time was left for our class to see.
"THREE MINUTES!" everyone else in the surrounding area yelled back. More howling and yelling as everyone was jumping up and down.
I could feel tears starting to form in the corner of my eyes. One chapter of my life was closing as another is beginning to start.
"ONE MINUTE!" Kenny yelled out again.
"ONE MINUTE!" We all yelled out back. Here we go. I'm scared. I'm happy.
"We're so close Ace!" I said to her as I put my arm across her shoulder. She just smiled at me. Antonio was on the other side of her, cheering with his friends.
"TEN!"
So close…
"NINE!"
Everyone started to countdown our very last ten seconds of high school.
"EIGHT!"
"SEVEN!"
"SIX!"
"FIVE!"
"FOUR!"
"THREE!"
We're done…
"TWO!"
We're done…
"ONE!"
We're done!!!
"ZERO! WHOO!"
The whole class erupted into cheers as everyone started to jump and congratulate people. Someone opening up a bottle of apple cider and started to spray it around the crowd. Me and Asia were jumping and hugging each other at the same time. The tears finally won and were flowing down my cheeks. But they were happy tears for once.
"Seniors '08! Seniors '08! Seniors '08!" everyone yelled at once for the last time.
"You guys have five minutes to get this all cleaned up and get to the auditorium for today's graduation practice!" the school principal yelled over us and tried – unsuccessfully – to get us to shut up and get us moving. We weren't about to let anything let this day ruin our feeling of accomplishment.
"I love you Ace!" I said to my twin sister and gave her another hug. She wiped a few tears away from her eyes and hugged me back.
"I love you too Sum."
"Summer!" Patrick came pushing through the crowd to give me a hug.
"We're done!" I told him as my arms wove around him. I was so glad that we were going to the same college. I don't know what I would do if my Patrick wasn't there to drag my ass to parties and all of that…not like I have totally given up my party side at all…But seriously, I'm so happy to have my best friend – besides Asia – coming to the same college as me.
"College here we come!" we both yelled at the same time.
So after graduation practice, I walked out to my Jeep after saying goodbye to everyone and telling them that I would see them tomorrow. I wanted tomorrow to come so fast but at the same time, I didn't want it to come either. I didn't want to face all of the people that I know and say goodbye to them. But I'm so excited to be done with high school. College here I come.
Just as I was opening my door, someone slammed it shut.
"What the hell do you think you-"…I turned around and spotted the one person that I really didn't feel like seeing right now.
"Summer I have to talk to you. Now. Please." Vyn said as he looked down at me. I was so caught off guard that I just kind of stuttered and didn't give him a straight answer. He took that as a yes and shoved me into my car – gently, though – and jumped into the passengers side. I was still in shock that Vyn was here, in my car, to say anything.
"Summer, I want you to understand this," he said without preamble. "I love you and I want us to work. I'll do whatever it takes for you to take me back."
Um…yeah.
"Summer, please don't give up on me," he said and took my hand. He interlaced our fingers and was holding onto my hand like it was his last lifeline. He gently grabbed my face and looked into my eyes. The atmosphere was suddenly very thick and intense.
Some words started to form.
"Vyn, you know why we can't start that again. There are just too many problems for us-"
"No, no, there isn't!" I took a deep breath in and tried to stay calm. What is it with guys and not knowing the meaning of no?
"Vyn, even if we got over our small problems, we still would have to deal with you and Taylor and whatever the hell is going on between you two. We're starting college in the fall and won't be going to the same school. And I don't know about you, but I can't go through a long-distance relationship."
"I have already told Taylor that I'm done with her and that I want you," he said and let go of my hand. He looked through the windshield to the outside and saw a few people walk by. His tone had gone down from frantic to a cool calm. "Summer, I know I messed up. I was being stupid and didn't tell you anything. Now I wish I had. These past few days have been hell knowing that I can't talk to you anymore. I love coming over to your house at night and surprising you. But now…I'm losing my mind. I didn't know how much I loved about you."
I came close to tearing up, but I had cried so much in the past few days that I didn't have the energy to cry anymore.
"I'm going to tell you the same thing that I told my dad: You should always know what you have before you lose it," I said and looked at him. I will always live by those words. I swear, people wouldn't get hurt if the lived by them like I do.
We didn't talk for a few minutes. Vyn had his foot up on the seat with his elbow on it, looking contemplative. I decided that this couldn't go on for much longer.
"Just leave it as it is, Vyn. We would only end up hurting each other later on down the road if we got back together," I said as I rubbed his arm comfortingly. It really hurt to know that I had a chance to get back together with him but I knew that it was better if we didn't.
Vyn just nodded his head and got ready to jump out of my car. As he opened up the door, he turned around and gave me the smile that I loved oh-so much.
"Friends?"
I was shocked to hear that word come out of his mouth. I wanted to be much more than friends…but not now. I smiled and nodded.
"Friends."
It hurts giving up something that you have wanted for so long. Even after having it for sometime, it still hurts to give it up. If these past few months have taught me something, they taught me to not let my ID get the best of me – See! I do pay attention in psychology. Ha! – and that love is not always beautiful.
But seriously, life isn't all about partying. I know now that I have so much time to have fun but there's also time to take life seriously. Relationships are a big part of life and I have to start fixing the ones that I have with my mom and Jacob. Even though he has screwed up, he's trying. It's going to be hard for me to be around him, but I'm willing to give it a try.
I'm off to Columbia University in the fall. Asia isn't coming with me and that scares the crap out of me. I haven't been separated from her more than a week when she went on some trip to New York junior year. But I'm excited to learn from new experiences and meet new people and all of that crap. Patrick will be coming with me, so I won't be starting this new experience alone.
I do love Vyn. That I do not doubt. The circumstances were just against us for anything to work out for us. I do wish that things did turn out differently. I can only hope that things won't be awkward in the future.
But that's the thing right? We don't know what the future has in store for us. I'll just have to take things in stride and hope that fate has mercy on me. Cause God only knows that I'm going to need every bit of it.
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Summer: Over and Out
A/N: See!! I told you that I would update in a couple of weeks - even though it's been like a month but oh well lol - but look!!! I'm all done!! I'm sad to see that this story is going to be completed but I'm quite happy because I've never been able to finish one before. Nick is going to start on her's soon and then this will be 100 percent done.
Sequal in the near future?: Yes, there will be a sequal, but me and Nick just dont know when. We've been playing around with some new story ideas so we'll see what happens...
What about Summer-Vyn and Asia-Antonio?!?: For Summer and Vyn, all I can tell you is that you have not seen the last of them. As for Asia and Antonio, you'll have to ask Nick about that.
If you guys want to get to know us a little better then you can go to our Myspace pages. Here are the url's:
melissa3765
leChaudChien
Just add those onto the regular myspace url and you'll find us. Feel free to add us to friends and whatever. We'll be happy to chat and all of that.
I want to thank each and everyone of you who have read and reviewed this story. You guys are some of the most amazing people ever! I won't be doing the A/N next time so this is probably the last time that you'll hear from me until I post the next story and all of that. Nicky is going to be writing it next time so you guys will be able to hear from her for once lol.
Please review and tell me what you think of the last chapter for Summer. I probably already know what you guys are going to say but you never know lol.
Thanks for sticking with us!
Mel & Nick