Prologue

People don't die on purpose.

But it doesn't mean I can't think that she did it just to spite me.

Someone actually had the nerve to suggest that she did it to save me.

Thinking back on it, I screwed up her life too. Back then, of course, we didn't think about it so much.

She used to write me letters. That's how it started, I guess.

I saw her in class one day and I had to talk to her. I almost needed to, which was strange because I was her teacher. At that moment it didn't matter, because at that moment, I wasn't looking for what ended up being and neither was she.

She laughed, which made me smile, which made her blush and look down at her hands.

I put her on a pedestal. It took me a while to realize she wasn't perfect.

Dear you,

It's been awhile, right? All of these forty-eight hours, I've been driving myself crazy with Milo. Is it weird that I'm writing to you about my love life? Regardless, don't make fun of me, okay? I know, big drama in a seventeen-year-old's life. Well, here I am in love with a moron.

I'm not gonna get too personal, so don't freak out and drop the letter. I know you haven't already because you're decent enough not to.

Milo's a moron because whenever I try to kiss him, he turns away and I end up planting one somewhere on his jawline. How embarrassing! I don't say anything, though. I just roll my eyes and hide in the bathroom until he comes to find me.

Then he has the nerve to ask what I'm doing.

Boys.

I'll see you Monday.

-Miranda

PS—I bet you'd love to know how I found your house to stick this in the mailbox. You know, since you're unlisted and don't even live in the school district.

Relax, I'm not a stalker. But that doesn't mean I'm going to tell you how I found you.

In class she was Myra. Outside and in her letters, she was Miranda. Miranda was her full name, but no one ever called her that.

She dubbed me "Lake", which I at first found annoying, but it stuck and after a little while I didn't mind it so much. Well, after a little while, she only called me "Lake" in class.

That was when she was seventeen. Outside she was older.

Outside, she was mine.