Injected Poison

The swallowing of the pill
My heart already dying,
Leaving everything behind.
Standing on uncertain grounds.
Softly calling,
Like a pray to save me.

It's seeping through my skin
Eating away at who I am.
Acid of drama and life.
The need to strive.
To live, to die.
All I do is reaching out
Searching for the remedy.

Fear replacing the warmth
Dreams that show me endless nightmares
Not a drop of sleep that is true.
Manifesting itself in my hands.
The love that became a nightmare.
To maintain what is already there.
Working too hard.

Against who I am.
I'm forgetting.
Running from discomfort,
Not knowing its origin.
Pleading in silence.
I've forgotten.

It's flowing in my veins
The poison of this life,
Death that hides amidst lies.
Uncertainty injected in my heart,
Eating away who I am.
Where is the remedy?
Who is my cure?

I'm relying on you
I'm desperate for you.
Just till my death,
I'll hang on so tight.
You are my poison,
You are my cure.
Forgive me.

Consuming all that was there,
I'm wishing to forget.
This is deadly pain.
Reaching out in tears,
Frantic hold on dead dreams.
Despise myself for this weakness,
Love myself for the long awaited agony.

I'm injecting poison in my life.
killing myself from the inside.
Death with my own truth.
Letting go of things my own way.
I'm still trying to die,
Within the romance,
Within the lust,
Within the heartbreak.
Dying.

Poet's note: If you can't tell, all these poems are pretty deep. Things mean different things and there's a lot of symbolism.